I am King of My Pond

I am King of my pond but very unhappy. In my current situation I should feel blessed. I always get the best flies because other frogs are frightened of me.

I am not one of them and they know it. But this place is not where I belong. I long for my house with a view of the East River, my library, a Blue-ray plasma television and my BMW.
My story is a sad one but I will share it with you.

Wow! Hold that thought a minute.

A lovely woman is passing by. She wears a low cut lavender blouse that accentuates a firm and lovely body. She also has a tiny waist and a skirt hugging her sexy rear. She is standing close to my pad. The sunlight picks up highlights in her hair. She shimmers like a golden princess.

Of course, I can only look and drool.

I jumped to a lily pad, with taller reeds so I can't be seen.
Once I was human, a successful lawyer looking for a wife. I dated many women and none met my criteria.
Fate had smiled on me with Vanessa, the girl of my dreams. She was stunningly beautiful, intelligent and agreed with me about everything. She was an old fashioned girl who wanted to be cared for. She wanted to keep a lovely home, cook and have babies. I was willing to give her a large allowance and only expected her to account for what she was spending.

Then tragedy struck. One afternoon, an unattractive girl I had dated and rejected came to me as a client. I agreed to take her hit and run case. She bent over my desk and kissed me. I was obviously repulsed.

She opened a match box and blew foul dust at me, "you will live as a toad since you know nothing about true beauty".

Now, back to the pond. My life is evading predators that want frog legs as a delicacy. Snakes are a frightening and real nightmare. One caught and digested my pal Alex two days ago. It is a lonely existence and flies are sustenance not a yummy meal.

I have learned my lesson. At least I think I deserve another chance. I could be a better person. It is cruel to have me sit here and watch women come by and I can only ogle them. Even the ugly ones look good now.

I hear a sensual female voice, "Laurel, this is a beautiful place for a picnic".
They put down a tablecloth and a basket, removing wine, bread and cheese.
I could see Laurel clearly now. It is the same woman that had made me a toad.
She must have had a complete overhaul because she was stunning now, class A prime for any guy.
I knew what I had to do. It was very frightening but I didn't want to live the rest of my life as a disgusting creature that causes warts. I would take a chance and humble myself.
I jumped directly into Laurel's lap. She seemed to be expecting me.
She asked, "Are you still a narrow minded bigot?"
I apologized, " I am determined to be a better person. Can you please give me another chance?"
She blinked and I was human again.
Now I don't know how many women have this power so I don't take any chances. I am a gentleman at all times. By the way, Vanessa heard the whole story and told me I hadn't changed. She definitly had some self-esteem issues she needed to work on.

There is another lasting impression; whenever I see toads, frogs or frog legs for sale, I shiver. Sometimes, I even break out in warts.

By Kathie Stehr