Twin Suicides

Two friends recently killed themselves. The following is only a small piece of how I feel.

You left me.
You embraced your steel lover.
His lips to yours.
In your absence I have lost my heart.

You left me.
You locked yourself away
with your cars' killer cloud.
in your absence I have lost my mind.

Why?
They tell me it is survivors guilt.
That I shouldn't wish to save you both.
I beg to differ,
I beg to know.
Why did you two choose to die,
when in my darkest despair
I choose to live?