Mrs Noah's Ark

Noah was glad to see some sunshine after forty days of rain.

"Daaaaadddd!" Noah felt his shoulders slump, when he heard Shem's voice. "Daaaaadd! Can the lions come out to stretch their legs? Ham wants to clean out their crate."

"Sure. Just let me get the geese back in first, or it'll be just like the Unicorns all over again. I'll just check on your mother, and then Ham can let the lions out - better find Japeth and warn him too, he can't afford to loose another leg. I swear that boy will do anything to get out of a decent days graft."

Noah felt every single one of his six-hundred years of age as he went to find Mrs Noah. To be fair, he had known she hated animals when he married her - just not how much. He met her well aimed voice as he entered their cabin.

"Creeping creatures! Honestly, what kind of supreme being tells a man to save those?"

"Oh, don't start. Please? I like God. He spared us, didn't He? Anyway what's a couple of cockroaches?"

"Noah - don't you give me that nonsense. While you're getting back to nature, I'm chasing rats out of the grain. What does He want them saving for?"

"Ooh, He'll hear you, you know?" Noah warned.

"I hope He bloomin' well does!"

"No, I mean it. Last night I saw Him in a vision, and he told me He would name the area we land on after the very first thing you say when we come aground!"

As if on cue, the ark lurched and a writhing tub of grain spilled out on the cantankerous couple.

"Aaarrrgggghhh! A rat!" She yelped.

"Good Lord, woman." Noah sounded exasperated. "You really are a dolt."

(293 words)