Memories

Where you're at, can you see what I do?
In Heaven can you hear me when I talk to you?
Hope you miss me, like I miss you.
Do you remember that year when I drove all the way,
in the middle of the night, to tell you Happy Birthday?
The look on your face, the tears in your eyes,
you were so happy, you were so suprised.
Do you remember coming up to Gaffney?
To see my new job, my apartment, and me.
and then the log house I moved in to
I loved that place because it reminded me of you.
I was so happy, and you were proud of me,
and now it's another bittersweet memory.
I remember being so scared when I had surgery,
and you came to Greenville, to check on me.
and when you got there no one knew
that you were coming so they didn't tell you
Where I was, or if I was alright.
and you were so mad and ready to fight
because you were so worried about me,
you were the first person I saw in recovery
and all the doctors and nurses knew
that you were just dong what any daddy would do.
You taught me to plant, you taught me to grow,
and later I learned you reap what you sow.
You bought me a horse and taught me to ride,
and when I fell off you wiped away the tears I cried.
Then made me get back up in the saddle and do it again,
taught me it's okay to be scared as long as your fear doesn't win.
I remember so much it hurts in side,
and this pain is real, this guilt is mine.
All the memories I keep in my head,
that's what I have left since you're dead.
You chose to die and walk away
and I did nothing to help you stay.
You never knew how much I loved you,
because I didn't do what a daughter should do.