Dark Lyrics © Rev. JP Vanir

1. DARKEST of night...

in this darkest of night...

the only place i know...

the only place that i feel is right...

for your days have only pain for me...

i will retreat into the only comfort i see...

when this world and its God has taken everything and everyone away...

darkness will come and rescue me and it is all i have everyday...

as the sunlight blinds my eyes and i rejoice as my pain dies...

come oh Lilith and Hecate into me...

you protect and set me free...




2. BLUT...


On the day of the dead's Samhain...

I call on you to Arise me...

and give me your energy...

on the art of your destruction...

you call on me to save you now...

if you just give me your BLOOD and eternal energy...

I dont ask for too much...

all I need is your life, BLOOD, and psychic energy...



3. Love => Blood


for all My Blood has been splilt for you...

in return I demand my reward...

Razors and hand cuffs is what I demand...

its my turn to give your fait...

I now the master Vampyre...

your slavery has come true...

and now Im cumming for you...

and what do you have to say now?

everythiung I need...

is now to come true...

and one day youll see this fate is way overdue...


4. Your Pain for My Pleasure...


Come now & split your skin for me...

you know you want this ecstacy...

your sinful pain is my pleasure...

your blood is my need...

all I want is your blood, body, and seed...

you are my everything....

when your on the floor bleeding....

and I have what I need on top of you feeding...

so taste my whip as I love you the HARD way...


5.

The Restless Undead Souls:
Current mood: contemplative

The many lives Ive seen...
The many Lives I have lived...
I tire of them all, I tire of existing...
Forever and ever again...
Dead souls everywhere...
But not mine For My Soul will never die...

Just to rest, just to sleep eternally...
For be done with all this pain...
All this suffering, lost loves, and misery...
How could anyone want this, to never rest?
how could anyone want this,
Bleeding the world dry?

Call me Vampyre, Call me Devil, or Demon...
Never ending Darkness is always best...
But it has a price of solitude and loneliness inside...
And never ending death and rest...
Undead Souls will always come back for more...


6. THE WRETCHED...

Just a reflection
Just a glimpse
Just a little reminder
Of all the what abouts
And all the might of beens
Could have beens
Another day
Some other way
But not another reason to continue
And now you're one of us
The wretched

The hopes and prays
The better days
The far aways
Forget it

It didn't turn out the way you wanted it to
It didn't turn out the way you wanted it did it?
It didn't turn out the way you wanted it to
It didn't turn out the way you wanted it did it?

Now you know
This is what it feels like
Now you know
This is what it feels like

The clouds will part and the sky cracks open
And God himself will reach his fucking arm
Through
Just to push you down
Just to hold you down
Stuck in this hole with the shit and the piss
And it's hard to believe it could come down to this
Back at the beginning
Sinking
Spinning

And in the end
We still pretend
The time we spend
Not knowing when
You're finally free
And you could be

But it didn't turn out the way you wanted it to
It didn't turn out quite the way that you wanted it

Now you know
This is what it feels like
Now you know
This is what it feels like

You can try to stop it but it keeps on coming
You can try to stop it but it keeps coming...


7. CONFUSION...

sometimes i wish i could understand my life anymore...

sometimes i don't understand whats the point...

sometimes i wish i could believe anyone i come in contact with...

but i just cant...

sometimes i wish i knew i wasn't going to be alone anymore...

sometimes i wish i had anyone...

sometimes i wish i was gone from here...

sometimes gone altogether...

sometimes i want to just give up...

but i just cant...

sometimes i wish i wasn't myself...

sometimes i wish i was someone else...

sometimes i wish someone cared...

but they don't...

sometimes i wish i wouldn't think think the way i do anymore...

but i don't...



8. forever is a lie...


My Love and any love has been gone for quit some time...

there is no happiness for being alone is all i see...

my life has no meaning for what is the point...

everything is soon to leave, sooner or later, nothing stays w/ me...

they say forever, but it is but a lie...

for there is nothing...

it is gone soon enough, before you die...

all alone...



9. I'm dying inside...

i have been nothing but depressed for days...
and i haven't heard from you in forever...
everyday i am alive i wish i wasn't...
i cannot wait to get out of this place, my own personal hell i have been in for years...
i never wanted to be hear and i only hope i can escape soon...
everyday seems like an eternity alone...
a loneliness i can never escape...
no matter what i do or how hard i try it seems impossible to get out...
impossible to go on...
all alone...


10. MY DARK ANGEL...


i come to in hope of love and i am over come...

i come to you, you give me more and then some...

i look to the future and it looks back, full as can be...

i pray to my goddess that i never wake up if this is just a dream for me...

i can not wait till we are finally together and our love is one...

i can not wait till i get out of this hell and this curse is undone...

i can not believe this love came to me and i am not alone...

you are my everything, my anything, forever i want us to be sewn...



11. I CANT TAKE THIS AGONY...


i have never felt so bad in so long as i do now...

why does this confusion come today in my lonely

agony...

why now, why did she have to come back?

my heart is so longing, yet there is no love for me...

they only want my sex, i guess that is all im good for...

sure, FUCK ME THEN THROUGH ME AWAY!

why couldn't you just fuck off?

whats the point of all this, why did you come back into

my life when you knew i was so in love w/ you?

Please somebody save me, before i die alone in this

desperate agony and all alone...


12. here come the clones again...


too many white shirts everywhere...

the pink hurting my eyes...

here come the clones again...

and they find me funny?

i find it amazing creativity is almost extinct...

why must i be a dying breed?

i cant believe i worry about what anyone thinks...

my Leo pride is sometimes a curse....

cursed i remain, cursed to remain in darkness...

the only comfort that i have...

keeping me in the shadows...

no more clones, if only, no more clones here...



13. no more cares, please take this fear from me


why cant just drop this passion...

fear of rejection...

my only real obstacle...

the only thing, keeping everything...

away from me...

all that i deserve and need...

nobody gives me the attention i need...

and i cant speak up, I'm stuck in this cage...

this solitude in my eternal darkness...

no passion for me, no one wants me...

will this ever end, will someone save me?

or am i forever stuck...

I MUST GIVE IT UP!

but can i?

AND JUST SAY I DON'T GIVE A FUCK!


14. MORE THAN THIS...


touch me, feel me...
i need to feel human hands...
for its been to long since i have been loved...
caressed and shoved...
its been far too long...
empty and alone...
i have nothing but darkness and solitude...
and i need something more...
than this isolation...
an immoral consecration...
a divine dark sensation...
to fill me again...
an unending most sensual sin...
an unholy erotic creation...
give me everything and even more...
a sadistic masochistic recreation...
anything than this...
anything at all...
let me fall into it all...


15. EROTIC NIGHTMARES:

i can be your bitch-your slave-i can be your man-or push you down till you behave~its all on you or it can be on me-lets pretend and see what we can be-lets mesh together-scare me...stair at me-wear me out...~i want your pain as you take mine-i have no doubt-so come take me down to your erotic underground~in you everything melt away-only absolute pleasure stays and will make us happy in these days...



16. LOVE NOTE TO DEATH:


here I go again wishing it was so again...that I could let YOU-embrace me and just LET GO...yet this shitty life has a hold on me but it will never LOVE me as you do...I wish we could be together and I could just let go...but im too WEAK and don?t know why im so scared of YOU??? but what could actually be worse???...life??? or the DEATH that loves me so...life has never given me a chance yet you want me...you desire MY soul but what can I do??? I want so to be w/ you but I just cant let go!!! I might still have a purpose (YEAH RIGHT)...but what could I possibly do??? what good could ever come of me??? a man w/ ONLY such PAIN and MISERY...would anyone EVER MISS ME (doubtfully) maybe for a second (NO-MORE) could anyone EVER love me??? NOTHING ever lasts anyways (esp-love) so why cant I LET GO!!! and let you take me away from all THIS (PAIN)...I can feel you CLOSER now...I know I should let you in if I can (I cant) if ever I can let go of my FEAR and LONGING for MORE...all I want/need is TRUE love all I need is ATTENTION and a (sensitive) listening ear...all I need is acceptance something I never receive/no one ever STAYS here...THEY ALL LEAVE-HATE ME(KILL ME)...NOBODY WANTS ME...yet you do (WONT LEAVE) I NEED you so-perhaps someday I will find the strength to just LET GO...


17. THIS VAMPYRES THEME:


So you say you don't want want to know why i am who i am & what it means to be me(why would anyone)? dead to the world and eternally free, for i have died to this conservative world and my fake life; to go back there i would rather put my throat under the knife. FOR ITS THE VAMPYRES LIFE FOR ME, TO DIE TO ALL THAT AND LIFE ANEW AND FREE ETERNALLY, LIKE A DREAM GIVING INTO YOUR DARKEST FANTASY AND LUST TO DRINK OF LIFE'S BLOOD AND ENERGY (ITS WHAT I AM AND CANT HELP BUT BE) even Jesus Christ told us to drink of blood for eternal life and salvation freeing us from death and damnation. why wouldn't i want to be free taking life and energy (as i need it, cant you see). what ever could be greater than this to live in darkness from the lights blinding rays forever free to live far from this so called normal society and all its conformist fascist ways? to give up the clone the sheep of normality to live as your true self free from the chains of conformity?


18. SHED AWAY...


wanting to shed this shield...
this weakening force field...
for these things i need, should freely proceed...
and not be contained...

as my pulse races...
from the energy all around...
my body can not take the power, so profound...


for i refuse to be denied...
or to give in...
i will not let take my control...

for what i need...
so true indeed...
and nothing will stop that now...

for some day i will be free...
to just be me...
the WHOLE vampyre i want to be...


19. I AM DONE WITH LOVE:

this is the last draw, this is the last time...
no more heart brake, no more lies...
i have am crush and way to sore...
i am done giving my everything and i don't care anymore...

for i will learn to be lonely and be content w/ myself...
for i cannot deny what i am and no one can except that
so i must give up, and never give in to useless desire i can never win...

for its all over now...
i want to believe, i want to be free...
but all i have is an empty me...


20. ALL I HAVE LEFT IS MY BITTERNESS...


for it is all i have now
for how can love anymore
with a heart so torn apart...

love only lasts for a second
everyone leaves me in the end
this bitterness is all they leave me with...

just lost memories how it will never again be.......

am i really so fucked up
no one can passably understand
so i drink again from my bitter cup...

drink the poison that consumes me
for i want to climb out of this pit
in the slavery that i sit...

you say i can but have you known my life? not quite...

for there is nothing here for me anymore...

the lonely pain is all i know too well...

ALL THAT IS LEFT NOW...


21. SOMETHING I WILL NEVER HAVE AGAIN...


as pale and beautiful as a full moon in the midnight sky...
as sweet and tender as a peach, a most delicious delight...
you fill my nights with pure love and ecstasy...
when i am with you happiness is all there is for me...
before you i was empty and lost, now i am content and no bitter cost...

i will always love you, always be true...
i am so in love and there is nothing for you i would not do...
you are everything to me...
you are all i want to be...


22. LONELINESS IN MY DARKNESS...


nothing ever last ...

and love is a fading disease...

but it will forever linger...

for those i love always leave too soon...

and happiness only lasts for a second in time...

i remember those times all to well...

as i am cast back into my hell...

all i want is the love and to receive back the same as all i gave...

but none none of that is for me...

for my cursed loneliness is all there is i see...

yet i give and give and give...

never to get anything back...

i never win...

i suppose i should give up and give in...

and realize pain and loneliness is all there is for me...

for darkness is all there is and ever will be...


23. what have i become...


everyone i meet, every one i love. they all leave me because of what i have become...
i cannot keep my sanity, i cannot keep my mind, because he takes it all away because the world was so unkind...
but i don't blame them, i done even blame myself. no one has done this too me i say again as i try to but the evil back on the shelf...

for there is an evil inside, the one who was born through hate, angst, and isolation...
for there is another inside me, another i want to deny, sometimes it controls me. sometimes i don't even realize this lost sensation...

i have lost all control, my body and mind, they are no longer mine.
no one understands...
this evil inside, from all the hurt and all the pain, rises up to take me...
its wants to control me, it wants to brake me...
i think i am lost forever. soon everyone will be gone....
how many have left now? too numerous to even begin...
i guess i should just give up...
but i do not want to give in...

is there any hope left for me?
for the one unloved...
the one no one can stand...
the one who is meant to be alone...
the one no one could ever love...


24. she took my death from me...


they call this life's little joke, gods evil plan...

only the meek must suffer...

for the sins of man...

but i never hurt a single soul...

i never wanted to endure..

i wanted to leave always...

but you took her...

and i am still standing here...

chosen to live this life i want for her...

and she is dying now...

going where i want to be...

taking my death and hostility...

as well as even more misery...

but soon it will be over...

i will still be here all alone...

she will have my death and her life is mine...


25. salvation in blood...

come to me...

come and join my world as i drink w/ you and and he...

join my reality,,,

all you are, all you see...

come inside for...

i need you to bleed for me...

i need your soul, to set us free...

i need some salvation from all this pain, for there is no love to see...

for in the blood we become one...

and in the love we make, we unite until all our pain is undone...

as everything leaves tomorrow and nothing is forever...

as we drink, we shall dilute the pain and sorrow...

for we are one...

as you run through me, we are undone...

together in this moment...

you are me, i am you, together, forever now free...


26. tweek..

hell is in my veins today, all i want to d is get away...

this devil has my tong, all i want to do is come undone...

cant take this anymore, cant take the lies, no more stress...

cant you see im dying here, by the redness in my eyes...

but what do you care? everything is gone now, all that i bare...

you've taken everything of me you've even got my death i see...

you have got it all now, cant understand why or how...

everything is gone from me, all of my reality...

you have stolen all i cherish, all i see...

this punishment for all that has become of me...



27. welcome, come inside...


come on in to the great unknown...

come to the underground where your darkness is shown...

join my world. come to my side...

open yourself up welcome the dark and in my blood you can

confide...

and life will be yours, everything will be clear...

as you open up your inner chambers, salvation is here...

for the blood will set you free...the all consuming energy...

salvation comes, not condemnation here...

reach down to your deepest core...

welcome in freedom in the blood, for the blinding light reins no more...


28. frustrating rage...

so what am i doing here, where i have wondered too many times

alone...

so who even cares?

i cannot take anymore of these in human crimes...

for i have been taken, but yet i have taken too...

for i have been forever beaten down...

and completely run through...

so why do i endure this? why must they suffer with me?

its all just a joke! gods little joke!

for you me and all humanity...


29. drain the empty ones...

i am here, draining these empty hollow people filling this empty

hollow me...

with there empty hollow negativity...

i know its not good, and they tell me too...

none of this can be good for you...

but it makes me complete, fills me up inside..

makes me want to brake out, and i will never hide...

they know what i am and i don't even care..

they know what i do, and its more than i can bare...

but i cant lie, i am what i am true to myself and true to you too...

i am not ashamed although they hate me.. i am what i am..

and im its what i am proud to be...

i fit in on where, i have no one...

i am all alone, in my emptiness...

for i am dead inside w/ no one to confess...

i have my sins, the ones i love so much...

i have my downfalls, the ones no one wants to touch...

but i will not give up, though dead inside..

i keep going on anyway...

and i will not die, i will live forever and yet another day...

© Rev. JP Vanir