Gender Translator

Adam rang the doorbell as he adjusted the ear-piece of his GT, Gender Translator. He reflected briefly what it must have been like decades ago when the different sexes had to guess what each other was really saying as they talked with each other.

Sue opened the door. "Adam, it's so nice to meet you."

The GT spoke mechanically into his ear "Hi."

Sue's ear-piece was barely visible under her hair.

"Sue, it's nice to meet you too. You look great in that dress"

Translation: "Maybe we can have sex later. Nice rack."

As they walked to the car Sue said "Nice car, I like the retro look."

Translation: "That car looks like a toy. What are you, twelve?"

As they drove to the restaurant, Sue passed the time by relating an amusing incident that happened to her earlier that day.

Adam responded with well-timed, "Ha Ha...that's funny."

Translation: "I really want to have sex later."

Eventually, they made it to the restaurant and settled in for a nice meal.

"Mmmmmm...this steak is great. How's your dinner?" he asked.

Translation: "I like steak. Can I have the rest of your chicken and potatoes?"

Sue smiled back and said, "I have never had chicken prepared this way. It's very interesting."

Translation: "I feel a headache coming on."

Dinner did not go so well. Adam sensed that failure was at hand. There was still hope to salvage the evening. He pulled up to her apartment complex.

"Let me walk you to the door."

Translation: "I am ready for sex now."

"There is no need to bother," she replied.

Translation: "There will be no sex for you tonight."

"Okay then. I'll call you sometime."

Translation: "Sex on some other day?"

"That would be great."

Translation: "Good luck. I have caller ID."

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