The Man in the Big Red Car

WARNING: This satirical bit may be offensive to those who have been victimized by sexual predators. Do not read it if you feel the warning applies to you.

The Man in the Big Red Car

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One day a man in a big red car asked the children if they wanted to go for a ride. Yes, they did!

But the man drove and drove and wouldn't let them out. They drove all night to another city.

Finally a policeman stopped the man in the big red car and told him he must not give any more rides to little children in his big red car.

So the Red Car Man decided to grow cabbages with his friend Bruce. He bought a pick up truck for his cabbage patch.

The Red Car Man gave the children rides in his green truck which was okay because it was not a big red car. The boys had to sit in the back. He let the girls sit up front so one girl could turn the steering wheel while the other girl worked his shift lever.

The Red Car Man liked to go to the playground and see the girls on the swings. He always wore a white shirt and tight white pants.

He liked to push Suzy on the swing. When her dress would fly up then the Red Car Man would sing out: "I see London, I see France, I see Suzy's underpants!" That made Suzy laugh.

When Suzy told her mom about that, her Mom said, "Looking at your underpants is one thing but you must never let him touch your underpants."

"Yes, m'am," Suzy said.

Sure enough, the very next time Suzy went swinging the Red Car Man was there and started touching Suzy's underpants. "Wait a minute," Suzy said. "I have to take these off. You're not allowed to touch them."