Don't Hate - Debate!

Except for the absence of copious quantities of flop-sweat, the final Presidential Debate last evening proved extremely reminiscent of another held long ago between Presidential hopefuls Richard Milhouse Nixon and John Fitzgerald Kennedy. Senator McCain had obviously been coached to come out swinging and attempt to lure Senator Obama into a knock-down, drag-out, bare-knuckled slugfest. The strategy wilted on the vine - as did Senator McCain by debate's end.

Though he charged out of the gate early on and managed to maintain a frenetic head of steam during the initial phase of the debate, it soon became quite evident that McCain was not debating, per se. Rather, he came across as a man resorting to slinging mud in an increasingly pathetic effort to set Obama up for a sucker punch takedown. Whether or not Obama has any glass jaw vulnerabilities became a mute issue; he proved too adept a statesman to lead with his face to begin with. Obama remained composed and offered frank, forthright responses that left McCain to shadow box himself into a frustrated and exhaustive state of political flux. Were that not sufficiently injurious unto itself, the elder statesman managed to fall into several self-excavated rabbit holes along the way.

Perhaps the most glaring example of such a tumble was McCain's diatribe regarding pro-choice and Roe vs. Wade. His remarks and apparent disdain for how much consideration is given to the concept of the mother's health in these matters did not sit well with me, and I'm certain countless other women will express similar discontent utilizing the be-all, end-all currency of their votes.

Then we have the issue of McCain's insinuations about Obama's long ago nebulous "relationship" with a known terrorist. Obama's insightful and honest response to these provocative accusations so neutralized McCain's first-strike attack stance that he was reduced to the now famous, spluttered comeback prefaced by the assertion, "we don't care about some washed up old terrorist..."

And who could forget Toledo's elusive and apparently unspeakably economically beleaguered Joe the Plumber, who McCain apparently now considers a dear personal friend and all-encompassing representative of John Q. American Citizen? Apparently Joe wants to purchase the plumbing business he's worked for for many years now, and John-Boy means to see to it that Joe-Boy's economic and business aspirations are not wrenched from his grasp by the free enterprise-hating Obama and his minions. To that end, McCain kept robotically droning on - on some 49 or so occasions - about how Obama's Presidency would see Joe's business driven into the ground by taxing it mercilessly, inclusive of any healthcare benefits it might offer it staff. Ignoring Obama's repeated reply that his proposals would affect only sizeable corporations; John just kept swinging at air and blowing smoke.

Basically, Mr. McCain, the American people are tired of politicians peeing on our shoes and telling us it's raining. And just so you know - Joe the plumber earns a helluva lot more per hour than the vast majority of middle class Americans do. So give it a rest, already - we all know that if Joe himself shook your hand next week, you wouldn't even recognize the poor schmuck. Last night, you couldn't even cough up his correctly pronounced surname, for Gawd's sake.

If McCain gave all he's got last night, my vote is already cast. For in this particular dawn's early light, Obama is not wiping mud off his face - McCain is scraping doodey off his shoes.