Going Home

Going Home

Soon we will be traveling home
to the place I ran from. The place
where all the bad things happend.
I'm kind of frightened to go back
on that property.

I can still remember all the yelling
and fighting. All the hurt and tears
that was shed there. God I hope
that I can stand livng there.

I know my father has changed
for the better. And he needs
me back there. But I am scared
that I will not be able to take it
if all the flashbacks come
crashing back.

I wonder if I will be able to sleep
on that property without having
nightmares. My husband is
excited and happy that we are
going back, part of me is too.

I can't help to have these doubts
about how I am going to feel. I
had a few flashbacks when we
went there in April. That's when
we got married.

But I didn't tell no body. I'm
sure I will be able to make it
threw. This is going to be
different we are going to be
living there now.

God please help take away
all these uneasy feelings I
feel. My dad is happy that
we are coming home. I
don't think he will change
back into the monster that
I used to know.

I hope he wont anyway, if
he does then he will lose
me all over again. And he
doesn't want that. He needs
us so much now. The cancer
he is battleling is taking a tole
on him. Going home is scary,
but it is something we need to do.