Awake.

I lay here awake in my room.
I think about my life and all its twists and turns.
I just can't get away from my terrors and nightmares.
I want to cry.
I know if I do I won't stop.
I go through life in a daze.
Like nothing is real.
I try to pretend that I'm ok and that I don't hurt inside.
All I want is for someone to understand me.
Sometimes I think I should end the pain.
It would be better that way.
But I don't want to hurt my family.
But as i sit here and think of my life and all its twists
and turns.