I Save Lives

"I save lives," I said to a guy at a party once.
          Well, considering I was completely plastered it probably came out more like "I shave wives". This would have been a big fumble in my attempt at flirting, but fortunately for me he was also wasted and while alcohol can make your mouth turn eloquent sentences into an incoherent slush, it also has the magical property of making it so the other person's ears can reshape the nonsense back into what you originally thought you were saying. This being said the guy still laughed at me.

          A statement like that from a man would make most girls swoon no matter how nerdy or undesirable he initially seemed, but apparently it does not have the same effect when said by a 5'3" blond girl who was wearing a toga that covered only the essentials. As a side note, alcohol does not compensate for a person who gets dressed drunk by making another person's mind put more clothes on them nor does it allow me to remember this fact when I stumble into my closet before going out.

          My inebriated Prince Charming just said "Sure" and smiled as if a hooker had just said she was paying her way through law school. Frustrated, I decided that using the male technique of pick up lines to attract the opposite sex was failing miserably so I reverted back to the standard female method. I smiled, giggled, and stuck out my large chest and accomplished my goal within seconds.

          Looking back it seems rather obvious that Mr. Fraternity would not have cared about anything that came out of my mouth unless it was "hey, lets go back to my/your place". Apparently, a toga frat party is not the place to project oneself as superwoman, even if you have actually saved a life or two.


Note: I've just started writing and wanted to get opinions. This is probably just an introduction to a longer short story. Let me know what you think, thanks!