Black Friday

The doors opened at 5 am. Women pushed shopping carts through the aisles, demolition derby style, shoving others out of the way. This was the war known as Black Friday! I darted past the toy section, the Mission Impossible theme in my head, watching briefly as a grown woman took a doll away from a screaming child. An old woman in a Mart-Cart collided with me, but I beat her to the last Cheese-Straightener 2000. I ran down the aisle with my cart, sweeping it off the shelf and never slowing down. Check Mom off the list.

Brett was next. I saw a woman hit a man in the face in a fight over the last MegaStar 6820, a great value computer at $400 off the regular price. I ducked as a LP printer flew over my head. I made the RPG game section just in time. I felt an elbow to my ribs, but I was not deterred from snatching the latest version of Gi-Gnome-Us, a game where giant gnomes fight to conquer Finland. Check Brett off the list.

Mayhem broke out in sporting goods. Word spread quickly through the store that a man attacked another with a hockey stick, fighting for a Bass Slayer. I sprinted to hardware for my husband’s gift: a NASCAR® all-in-one Tire pump, Deer Skinner, Bottle Opener. I hear a voice. Where was it coming from?

My husband shook me, “Honey, are you okay?”

I opened my eyes to the solitude of my bedroom. It was only a nightmare. Thank God for online shopping. My cheese-straightener 2000, Gi-Gnome-Us and the All-in-One Man Gift were already under the tree. Did I pay more? Probably, but it was worth avoiding Black Friday altogether. I closed my eyes again, smelling coffee brewing.

Word Count: 295