Another Magoo Movie Review

Mr. Magoo’s Movie Review of "Twilight"

“This is WSEE radio, and Movie Reviews with your host. Mr. Quincy Magoo”.  Music fades.

“This large light is blinking, what’s that?  We’re live, now?  Uh, Mr Magoo here, welcome to the show and we are going to talk about an interesting movie today kids, called Twilight.  You know, that crazy O’Reilly has the No Spin Zone, so today here at Magoo’s we have the Twilight Zone .  I remembered to bring my very best pair of spectacles to the movie theater this time and Magoo had no trouble seeing this one.  The movie was broken down into four different stories of horror/sci-fi segments. Each directed by the famous director who made the classic version of the story from Rod Serling's landmark television series."

“Oh look, I think we have a caller.  Magoo Movie Review, I’m happy to hear from you.”

“Hey Magoo man," a male voice said. "I think you’re talking about the wrong movie, you’re supposed to be reviewing Twilight."

“Correct, Twilight, that’s it.”

“Yeh not,The Twilight Zone but the new film called Twilight,” voiced loudly.

“Yes, yes, I heard you sonny Twilight?  Ol’ Magoo is not deaf, you know, he just has a little trouble seeing that’s all. Let me check my notes here.  Oh Magoo, you've done it again!  I had the wrong sheet of paper.  Here are my notes on that Twilight movie, yes indeed.  They are written in my granddaughter’s hand because I went with her to see it, and, hee, hee, I have to admit I took a little nap.  Magoo can’t stay awake through slow parts in a movie like he used to. Wait, now we have another caller.  Magoo Movie Review, I’m happy to hear from you.”

“Hi Mr. Magoo, I love Robert Pattison,” gushed a young female voice.

“Yes that’s very nice dear, but this is a movie review show not the lonely hearts club.”

“But he was in the movie and I just love him…" she adds with a nervous giggle.

“Ah yes, an interesting character indeed.  Let me see, I’m looking on these notes, umm I don’t remember there being a character named Robert that in the movie.”

“No, he’s not a character, he’s an actor.”

“An actor. Robert Pattison?  No, never heard of him.  But Robert De Niro I’ve heard of, a fine actor.  A particularly compelling performance in Mission Impossible.”

“No, Mr. Magoo, Robert Pattison played Edward Cullen in the movie.  He was the soulmate and true love of Bella.  And their families and friends tried to keep when apart. Do you remember that? Such a beautiful love story.”

“Beautiful, yes my dear, yes, yes.  But what the Montagues and the Capulets don’t understand is that the two lovers will only be parted at death. Tragic, sad, sad.  Young love is always destined to die. Thank you for your comments and we go to the next caller.”

“I joined the discussion late, so my question, Mr. Magoo, sir, is are we talking about the movie Romeo and Juliet with Leonardo DiCapro or the older version directed by Franco Zeffirelli?” a lady’s voice asks.

“Well, I don’t know, which one would you like to talk about?  I loved them both.  Though there is something to be said about the classic version, especially since in the newer version DiCapro ran around wearing that silly mask the whole time.  But I can see what a young lady would see in him.  Oops, we have another blinking light, thanks for the call.”

“Magoo man, let’s get back to talking about the vampire flick, Twilight.  I think it was cool how the Edward’s vampire family went on long hikes into the woods to prey on the blood of animals instead of consuming human blood.  It’s like they were vampire vegans.”

“Vampires? Are you sure he was a vampire?  He had no fangs, no cape.  Oh my, perhaps I should not have taken my granddaughter to see this.  I hope it wasn’t scary, was it?”

“No way man, it was kids stuff - but pretty decent. You should go back and see it again.  And not fall asleep this time.”

“A movie with vampires?  Well, Magoo doesn’t really care for films with vampires. But judging by the TV footage of young girls screaming and crying over the film stars, if you fit their description you’ll probably love this movie.  Ok, boys and girls we are out of time.  Next week we will be reviewing the movie The Incredible Hulk starring Ed Norton as a bus driver who struggles to strike it rich while his wife looks on with weary patience.  For now, this is Mr. Magoo, bidding you adieu.”

(word count is 781)