'Twas the Night Before Christmas

THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the town,
few people were snoozing, for the power was down;
In homes full of Christians, 'round the tree they did gather,
Gifts nestled below it, the youngsters all in a lather,
Our childrens' dreams of Santa, this blackout won't scupper,
Old St. Nick must have come, when we partook in supper,
As they sat waiting for lights, there was no fire to tend,
No flames in the hearth, lest they broil Nick's rear end.
Other folks returned to their homes with their bellies quite swollen,
Wonton soup in their veins, beef lo mein in their colon,
Disappointment abounded with the after dinner activities,
Movie theaters weren't immune to mother nature's proclivities,
Perhaps Christmas day will offer a more promising fate,
A matinee and dinner at Denny's on the interstate.
Not long after the candles had melted away,
And the childrens' flashlights had fallen astray,
A noise could be heard had anyone been awake,
A sound like a chopper made all the homes quake.
Down through the chimney shot a large bellied fellow,
St. Nick himself, his cheeks red as cherry jello,
Ho ho ho, said old Santa, and his stomach jiggled and stirred,
My reindeer are on strike, so I flew in on a whirlybird.
He lay down his bag, which was swollen with presents,
And gazed 'round the room, and found cookie-less contents,
Setting aside disappointment, he sat on a chair set for rocking,
More puzzled was he, when his eyes found no tree and no stocking.
A creak from the floor startled St. Nick,
An old lady hobbled downstairs surprisingly quick,
Merry Christmas, said Claus, rising fast to his feet,
He reached into his bag, seeking out a real treat.
Never mind that, sir, said the woman with a smile,
I think you've got the wrong house, Christmas isn't our style.
Not your style, asked St. Nick, whatever could that mean?
At a table she pointed, empty white boxes of Asian cuisine.
The jolly fellow raised his bushy brows, and his head he did shake,
Terribly sorry, madam, it must have been my mistake.
And he gathered his things, heading back to the hearth,
Back up he would go, lumbering his somewhat large girth.
Wait a moment, said the lady, I have something to give you,
She held out fortune cookies, and said here take a few.
By the way, she continued, you'll have much more luck next door,
Though the power's still out, trust me, they've got Christmas lights by the score.
Old St. Nick ate the cookies, and some cold Chinese tea,
'Twas delightful, he said, but I really must flee.
He shimmied up the chimney, to the roof did he climb,
Fired up the chopper, checking his watch for the time,
The woman stepped outside, across her face wet snow spread,
A helicopter to go next door? He couldn't walk there instead?
But as the copter flew higher, disappearing from sight,
A merry voice in her head said, Happy Holidays to you, and to yours, a good night!