Dear Me

WDC Prompt 2009

Dear Me,

"Who, me?"

"Yes, you. Do you see anyone else around here?"

"No, just me."

"Very good; now write your letter."

"What letter? For... what?"

"Your goals. It's that time of year again."

"Who are you, anyway?"

"Your conscious, of course. Who else would be talking in your head?"

"Please go away. I don't need you."

"Yes, you do, actually."

"For what? To bug me all the time?"

"I take offense of that! I'm here to help you!"

"Oh. Sorry."

"So... do you have any?"

"Any what?"

"Ugh! How'd I get this job, anyway?"

"Oh, yeah. Goals."

"And..."

"The usual, I suppose."

"Meaning...

"Better diet, more exercise, get organized."

"Why don't you try something different?"

"And break tradition?"

"Come on. These only last a few weeks, a month if you're lucky."

"So... what are you saying? You have a goal picked out for me?"

"No, no, no. Just pick something, oh, unusual."

"I'm not giving up the few vices I have. Then I wouldn't be human."

"You are exhausting, do you know that?"

"I'm not perfect, like you."

"Please. No, you don't have to give up your vices. Isn't there something you have always wanted to do? Or something you've always dreamed about? Don't you have any goals beyond your body and housecleaning?"

"Well... yeah. But the older I get, the more I realize it probably won't happen."

"You're being selfish with that attitude."

"Selfish! Oh, geesh! What is that suppose to mean!"

"You want something and are giving yourself excuses why you shouldn't get it."

"And why would I do that, smarty pants?"

"Because you are afraid of failure."

"This makes no sense at all."

"Think about it. By not striving for what you want, you won't fail. If you become ambitious and try with all your heart to reach your goal, but don't make it, you will feel like a failure."

"I don't have a chance, so why even try?"

"You don't know that and you won't know that unless you go for it."

"Okay, so what if I actually send my manuscripts out for the next ten years and receive rejection slips for every single one? I'm going to feel better about myself?"

"Actually, yes."

"How'd you get to be such a know-it-all, anyway? How'd I ever get you for a conscious?"

"Fate. Now... back to your goal."

"It's not my goal."

"It is."

"Not."

"Is."

"Can you be quiet just for a second?"

"So you can think?"

"Can't you go on vacation, or something?"

"You're stuck with me the rest of your life."

"Beautiful."

"Remember when you were ten?"

"And you do?"

"Your grandmother gave you a book with blank pages for you to write stories in. You still have it upstairs."

"Okay. And the point is..."

"You dedicated it to her and promised if you ever got a book published in your lifetime, the first one would be dedicated to her."

"She believed in me, even then."

"So start believing in yourself. She's gone now, but I bet she's watching."

"I should do it for her, shouldn't I?"

"No. You should do it for you. And dedicate it to her."

"There's too much competition out there."

"But every single person who is competing, doesn't have your attitude, and guess what? Some of them are going to get published!"

"And most are not."

"How'd you get to be so positive?"

"Accomplishing goals, I suppose."

"Come on. Give it a whirl. If you start sending in your work now, and do it for one year, see what happens. You know you want to; you're just afraid. Give yourself a chance. Believe in yourself, like your grandma did."

"What if I disappoint her?"

"Grandmothers love their grandchildren no matter what."

"Okay. Maybe I can do this."

"You will feel better for trying."

"You're probably right, but it's hard to admit."

"People argue with their conscious all the time."

"Hmm... can't imagine why."

"So are you going to do it?"

"Yes. I am going to do it."

"It will be tough getting started, but you'll get into the swing of it."

"I hope you're right."

"I'm always right. I'm your conscious, remember?"

"You won't let me forget. But hey, thanks. And I mean that."

"So are you going to write it down?"

"That I meant what I said? You're nuts!"

"No, silly. Your goal. You need to write it down and sign and date it."

"You're such a pain, you know it?"

"But I'm always right."

"Okay, okay, here is goes."

Dear Me,

I will send out manuscripts to publishers for one year and not give up. May my conscious be my guide.

~ Cubby 01-10-09