Surrender, You Say?

“…the questions you find haunting and the wishes you hold dear
are the things you must surrender for the answer you so fear.”
                                                                            Tom

Surrender, You Say?

Every ounce of my being says
Don’t let go, so I hold onto the cliff,
knuckes white, nails full of dust and grime
as fear nips at my toes, summoning me from below
“Let go, Let go, I’m here to catch you.”  But no,
that could not be so, I have never known
a time when I knew someone would catch me.
I wish I could trust each person that I meet,
quit asking of them Do you like me yet?
Why can’t you show me? Why don’t you want me?
“Surrender”, you say, “and then you will find
the answer to what you so fear?”  Look down, my friend. 
Is that a canyon or someone you hold dear?
Do you see a branch reaching out to cut you
or do you see a loved one reaching out to break your fall? 
Do you know what you’re asking me to do?
“Let go”, you say, “let go of what you fear.” 
But I’m not holding on to what I fear.
If I could touch fear, I would not be afraid. 
What I fear is letting go, and landing
in a crumpled heap, at nobody’s feet.
When you have been in my shoes,
surrender is not an easy thing to seek.


SWPoet

Written for some special people in my life who find it very difficult
to stop seeking their worth in other people’s eyes, fearing
more than anything, being lonely.