Similies and Metaphors

Assignment 1

1:  I ran into the living room, throwing my backpack down.  “Hey, Dad!  I’m home!  How was your day?”

“Good.” He sat with the remote in one hand and In-Fisherman Magazine in the other.  He spread his arms and moved over to let me sit on the arm of his over-sized easy chair.

“What was wrong with that truck you said you we’re going to work on?”  I loved to hear about him figuring out mechanical problems and finding temporary solutions to keep the construction equipment running.

“Tranny,” he grunted, giving me a big bear hug.

“I bet they needed that truck today, huh?  And I bet you fixed it, huh?” I hugged him back.

“Yep.”  He smiled and went back to his magazine.

2: When Betty walked into the room everyone went silent.  She first yelled at Tamara because the coffee pot was empty.  Next she unleashed on Dan.  Her meeting notes were not ready and she expected him to simply know what the meeting was about and to have her ideas prepared.  Shandra walked by and Betty wielded on her next.  She hadn’t mentioned she needed a projector in the conference room by 9 am.  She expected that Shandra would know that.  Then she turned on me.

“Look, Betty,” I tried to remain poised.  “I’m turning in my notice.  I don’t really know what your deal is, but I won’t deal with this every day.  Did you ever think that the time you’ve spent yelling at everyone else in the office might have been better used making coffee or getting the projector into the conference room?”  Without giving her time to retaliate, I turned away, “If you’ll excuse me, I need to clean out my desk.”

3: By the time I was seven, Grandpa was sure that I was an alien.  Of course, he was also sure that Hitler was living in his basement and that plastic itself was a communist plot.


7.  I walked into the school on Monday morning.  The lights glared and the smell of floor cleaner turned my stomach.  I walked close to the wall as I passed a group of football players.  They actually looked happy, slapping each other on the back and laughing.  I groaned and looked down at my untied Reeboks, the laces clicking against the hard tile floor.  I shoved my hands deeper into my pockets.  I tried to remember my Biology vocabulary words that I would be tested on first hour, but I had no clue.  Who cared about that crap anyway?  I was wasting my time here.  I had a job.  That’s all I needed.  A group of girls scampered by whispering and giggling.  I wanted to beat my own head into the metal lockers that lined the hall.  Why did I have to be here?

11.  My brother Ted finally lost his job at the factory.  They asked him to take an early retirement.  Everyone knew he had Vodka for breakfast, just like everyone knew his thermos was not filled with just coffee.  He stumbled in to work the same way he stumbled home after stopping at The Always Inn for three hours after work each day.

12.  When the stewardess came over the intercom to tell us we would be taking off, my fingers instantly tightened around my husband’s leg.  He winced, but didn’t say anything.  We’d been through this before.  I knew my nails were leaving deep impressions in his flesh, but I couldn’t help it.  I concentrated hard on breathing normally.  Sweat ran down my sides from my armpits.  As the plane taxied down the runway, I was sure I would pass out.



Assignment 2: Metaphors!

1)          George
a.          George was a wet towel thrown on the bathroom floor for days.
b.          George’s life at the factory was a rerun of a bad B movie where the honest, decent guy never got a break.
c.          George felt like a piece of bread left on the counter for a week, dried and stale.
d.          George was an easy chair with stuffing bursting from every seam and a spring coming up through the fabric.
2)          Katie
a.          Katie felt like a three-minute egg cooked for ten.
b.          Katie was a glass rod, heated to the point of drooping.
c.          Katie felt as worn out as a hiker who just scaled the tallest peak in the state.
d.          Katie was a 30,000 mile tire, driven for 75,000.
3)          Kim Su
a.          Kim Su was as confused as Bart Simpson at a Mensa convention.
b.          The registration felt like a mosh pit.
c.          Kim Su felt like a car traveling at a high speed on black ice.
d.          Kim Su was as confused as a used car salesman at an ethics seminar.
4)          Victor
a.           Victor was a sponge all summer, soaking in all that daytime TV had to offer.
b.          When vacation was over, Victor was as out of touch as a polyester leisure suit.
c.          Victor was the answer to the question nobody asked.
5)          Sandy
a.          Sandy was a compass that had come to rest pointing North.
b.          Sandy was as relieved as a baseball fan walking out of a port-a-potty after a six pack of beer and a thirty minute wait.
c.          Sandy was a sunny, calm day on the lake with just enough breeze to keep the mosquitoes away.