Lesson #7/2

Original:
When Harry was eight years old his parents moved him to New York. It seemed very odd to the little boy to live in a place where there were so many people, and such great houses. After a while the weather grew cold and he had to wear thick woolen clothing. The sky was gray and cloudy one afternoon, and Harry had been standing by the window watching the street cars. Suddenly the air grew thick and he could scarcely see the houses on the other side of the street. Harry remembers when he was little, the only time the sky was dark and cloudy is when a storm passed over his island, leaving a lot of rain. It would always clear up and remain very warm. He would go outside and walk along the shore, kicking seaweed and collecting seashells. Suddenly, something white and feathery began falling slowly down and rested on the window ledge. Then it disappeared. But more and more of the little flakes came, until there was quite a ridge outside of the window. Harry opened the sash gently, fearing it might fly away. He was surprised when he touched it to find it so cold. He took some up in his hand, but in a moment it was only a drop of water. By that time the street and the men's hats and coats were quite white.

Re-worked for assignment:
Harry was a young boy when he moved to New York. It seemed unusual to live in a place crowded with people and skyscrapers. Not longer after arriving, so did the winter months. The skies became gray and Harry had to bundle up to play outside. When he was little, Harry remembered skies like this and rain always followed. When it cleared, it would remain warm and he could play on the beach in shorts.

Harry was looking out the window when something white and feathery began falling slowly through the air. They disappeared as they landed on the window ledge but after a few minutes, they began to pile up. He opened the window with care, he didn't want the white pillow to blow away. He reached out with his fingers and touched the pile. He was surprised it was cold. He picked some up, but it turned to water. He let the drops fall from his hand and noticed how much of this white stuff was on the streets and covering people's clothes.