Not for Love, but Money

Not for Love, but Money

Father Paroni loved God, his Church, work, and the people he served. He cut a nice image with his crisp Roman collar and starched shirt with his jet-black pants. He prayed and meditated at all times. He was so good at performing his duties that he was awarded a private audience with the Pope by the Vatican for dedicated service to the parishioners of his parish. The Bishop and the entire Archdiocese he served in respected Father Paroni, and he even performed a work of charity no one, absolutely no one, even knew about. Father was committed to converting a prostitute to a wholesome life.

“I’d turn about eight tricks a night, Padre, eight Johns paid me for ballen them, which I hated, but it paid my bills,” said Annie to Father Paroni on one of her regular visits to Father’s office.

“Damn, I’m good, but am getting broke. Worken the Mac Donald’s job you got for me doesn’t pay much. Couldn’t you get me work that I like that pays sumpen?” asked Annie. Annie stood 5’2’’ tall and had a perfect model like figure. She wore tight fitting sweaters and micro skirts; she carried a little crucifix in her purse

“I have a few friends who could use some employees, but you would need more schooling, my child,” answered the good priest. “One friend needs a typist/file clerk, and the other could use you as a security officer.”

“Padre, I used to get $1,000 a night, without needen any more schooling than how to make John’s glad to be alive. I would do little things and say some soft words thated make em happier than they’ve been in years; a little feel here, a little tug at something there, and Jesus, my men would smile and laugh,” said Annie. “This worken Mc Donald’s is good work, people see me as bein a good girl; just don’t get enough bread.”

“Here read this outline of a security guard’s job,” said Father, and Annie picked up the pamphlet and started to read; she put it back on Father’s desk.

“I can’t do this kind of stuff: Challenge employees to show their ID, patrol buildings checking for water leaks or intruders; no way-I won’t do this,” said Annie.

“Here’s a typewriter, can you type on it?” asked Father.

“Can, but not fast,” said Annie as she began to type the copy that Father had set next to the typewriter.

“OK, that’s enough for warm up. Let me give you a little test. Type what’s on the copy, and I’ll be right back,” said Father Paroni. Annie typed and typed, and Father returned in five minutes.

“OK, stop!” said Father. “Let me count the number of words you typed.”

Father took the paper out of the typewriter only to find merely two sentences upon the paper with three mistakes in those. “Sweetheart, my friend couldn’t pay you for your typing; I’m sorry.”

“Well, what the hell; what you expect a law clerk?” asked Annie. Try and come up with more friends with work, Padre, I need to go” said the ex-prostitute. I’m headen to Mc Donald’s to pound on the cash register.

“I’ll check around for other work you might do, my child,” said Father Paroni. Father telephoned his friends, and found only one job Annie could do-veterinarian’s assistant. When Annie returned, Father explained where she should go and to whom she should apply for the job as veterinarian’s assistant. Annie took off for the animal hospital with a letter from Father, but when she returned the next day, she was in tears.

Annie told Father that it made her sick to clean animal’s cages.

“Padre, you were talken about turning to Jesus to be saved. You said I could have a happy life with out banging boys, well, where is it? Mc Donald’s pay is just not enough for me to eat and pay my rent. I don’t know what I’m goin to do, Padre. Any ideas?” asked Annie.

“We could try the Department of Employment’s Rehabilitation for the Handicapped Center? said Father.”

“I’m not handicapped.”

“I could write a letter stating that you are. I could say you have a small mental problem,” said Father.

“You know I don’t have any mental problem, but I’m crazy about you. You know since you’re Jesus’ friend, I want to give you a lay on the house. No one will know, and it would make me feel like I done sumpen for you, how about it, Father, would you enjoy a special lay?”

“Thank you, my child, but I am sworn to virginity; if it wasn’t for my love of God and His Church, you’d make me a happy man.”

“Ok, Padre, but you don’t know what you’re missen. I know what I am doing when I ball. You’d love it.”

“My child, it would be against our rules, now run along,” said Father Paroni. “I’ll try to think of how you might earn more money.”

“Good, but right now, I’m hungry and am goin to get sumpen to eat. I’ll bring you back a sandwich; would you eat it?”

“Sure,” answered Father. Annie left and returned with a Mc Chicken for Father. The sandwich was from where she worked, and the poison she put in the sandwich was from a girl she met while turning tricks on the street.

“Here’s a little snack I brought over for you,” said Annie, and the priest ate the Mc Chicken, laced with arsenic like poison. I have to go Padre; I have to go and find more money. I’m sorry you didn’t want me!” By by,” said Annie, “by, by,” and she left to return to her old work. “Hey, Mr. Want a date?”