A dialogue with Self - Part II

Sometimes, somewhere, in the midst of nowhere,
it is there that you stand,
alone, aloof, departed,
there, yet not..
What a trickery
and you fool.
Fool them that you are,
while you aren't.
It’s a trick you have learnt
and now it's a part of your life,
just like that right hand.
You don't even notice or flinch,
it's just there,
as if meant to be.
Drifting apart,
slowly and gradually,
ah! Did someone notice?
Not I think,
am too clever you know.

You would never know,
what it was
and how it came to pass.
When the day will come
and the night will ascend,
it will be dark
and lonely.
For that I have been
and would ever be.
You are just a speck of creation
and so am I,
for I have never been.

It’s near I know,
as I have always known
but can't tell you,
for I will let it be.
When it will be here,
you will live through.
No big task,
others have
and so have I,
here and somewhere far,
in the land of dreams and fantasy.
Afraid to step onto the soil,
it's cold, I heard
but I need warmth.
Enough of winter I have had,
just give me some sun,
to shine upon and caress with sunlight.
For the bones are frozen
and so are emotions.
Stifling a sound,
not letting it escape,
what if someone hears?
Can’t do it.

Is it still so far?
No, oh no, the day is near.
But I am asking about the summer,
the spring, the rains.
For it is when things will be set right,
I heard an angel whisper in my ear
and I believe it to be true.
When truth beholds the happiness,
it's dreams that keep you alive
and so I prefer living there,
instead of being real..

I know am not
and yes, maybe I do, as you say.
I love this suffering.
Oh yes! I do,
coz there's no fear, you know,
fear of losing.
All is free,
isn't that what I wanted?
Wings to fly,
see I have them right here
but where's my sky?
Oh! I ask thee my Lord, where is my sky?
You have given me the wings I wanted
but made me bereft of the sky I needed.
Why, oh, why did you listen to this lowly creature?
You, the Almighty, have always known the best.
I just do not stand.

I have lost my sky
and fear to step on earth,
lying between, struggling to stay afloat, to survive.
Hoping someday the skies would open up,
if not to let me fly,
then perhaps to devour me
but free me of the constant pain,
that aches within my heart
and troubles me to no end.
Oh dear, just wish the world for you,
for you deserve it all.
Me, just a lowly one,
not there, I never was.

Just waiting to fall on the ground,
with a force so great,
that no breath would last
and no pain.

© Copyright 2009 Christina~miss you Lyle. (UN: christina at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
Christina~miss you Lyle. has granted Writing.Com, its affiliates and syndicates non-exclusive rights to display this work.