Waiting to Know

Rubiyat Poem
Waiting to know.
 
 
 
A knew a life, drawn from Heaven; a time I’ve pondered so much.
My memories are gentle, caressing thoughts – a warming touch.
But I let slip by, that which should have been, my destiny.
A venture now lost, known only to tears, still kept as nonesuch.
 
 
I have dreamt so many times - visions have all but occupied my soul.
I can no longer feel around me, I cannot sense any part of the whole.
Memories, like snapshots, persuade my being, to be that - what I must.
I am no longer my own, stripped of resolve – history now has control.
 
 
I have lived this way, indeed all my life - it has owned, all of my time.
The warming touch is cooler now; my heart has committed this crime.
None worthy received - for only one, might have been the one.
Hasten any love and shorten all passion - left forsaken and sublime.
 
 
But events in living turn, and acquire that, which we must live by –
a second chance presented; a reunion it is, and another chance to try.
My heart has skipped, and not moved since my presence in this yesterday.
Feelings returned! Are we the same? I am given love, not knowing why.
 
 
For a time, I am lost, but not to pain or misery be – to a joyful place.
Dreams awaken and come to life, the longing I can now embrace!
What I thought be hopeless, is suddenly a truth, that pushes against me.
God has forgiven, answered my prayers, and shown me his grace.
 
 
Yet events must turn, and the truth be told, which is true for us all.
Companionship is yearned, and is always deserved, when loneness calls.
How can I show her, all within my heart? He knows what is now - I’m only the past.
What was my flight now drifts in winds of doubt; I am just waiting to fall.
 
 
Tonight is the telling; the ending be told – will love be his or from long ago?
A decision in making, be it he or I, to earn a woman’s love – an endless bestow.
For me a glimpse and now I will die. It was a dream that bleeds my heart, endlessly.
I would rather face hell, be dead to living, than just simply waiting to know.
 
 
Maria, I love you and I will wait for you, forever. No matter what you do; no matter what you decide. When Heaven comes, I will be there waiting for you.
 
 
 
Kactus Berry