I Wrote Some Trash

I Wrote Some Trash

(A shameless rip-off the song "Monster Mash")

by Indelibleink (Forgive Me, Boris)

Logged on to WDC, late one night
When my typing revealed an eerie sight
For a monster of words began to rise
And suddenly, to no one's surprise

I wrote some trash
And made large piles of trash
I'm good at trash
I was so young and brash
I wrote some trash
Just hoped to earn some cash
But it was trash
Yes, it was clearly trash

From my keyboard sprang a few words, at least
But it appeared that most of my creativity had ceased
The reviews all came back - I guess - in code
All one's and two's, they conclusively showed

That I write trash
Yes I write piles of trash
They called it trash
Even my best fiction (flash)
I wrote some trash
Gave some reviewers a rash
'Cause it was trash
Yep, it was clearly trash

Appearing that I might be done
My writing career over before it had begun
I guess I could be a WDC moderator
And heckle others, just for fun

Not giving up, my creative juices abound
Trying to make prime rib out of week-old ground round
The reviewing group was about to arrive
And I was hell-bent on receiving a "5"

But....

They called it trash
They called it worse than trash
My work was trash
It made my spell-checker crash
It's all just trash
They said my adverbs "clash"
Huge piles of trash
They said my work was trash

Inside my office, my telly did ring
Seems my agent was bothered by just one thing
The only thing left on my editor's list
Was to inform me that I've been fired (dismissed).

He said it's trash
Said "All you write is trash"
Just called it trash
"Clean out your office in a flash"
"Cause you spew trash"
"Huge, smelly piles of trash"
He called it trash
He said my work was trash

Now everything's cool, I know where I stand
My rejected stories now litter the land
But if you'd like to read some, you're welcome to
'Cause I really could use, a favorable review!

You'll call it trash
You'll call it dumpster trash
Yes, dumpster trash
Now you're getting a rash
I know it's trash
But I could use a little cash
Please buy my trash
Please buy my dumpster trash!


 

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