Destructive Thoughts

Sometimes I wonder if life is worth living,
My next choice could be very unforgiving.
Fire and negativity flow through my mind,
As I hold this object, that has a very deadly design.
I am itching for a reason not to put myself to rest,
Thinking for everyone else this would be for the best.
I try to do the best I can, but it's never enough,
I don't do anything big wrong, but you explode on the small stuff.
My head wrenches in pain from these ringing voices of anger,
Everyday it's like a duel between two gunslingers.
There is only so much that I can take,
Before I drown myself in this ever so inviting lake.