Life On Camera: Web-comic Episode 4

What happens when a 16 year old witch kills the star of a Japanese reality television show, and then receives her own reality show? From a guy who watched The Office, 30 Rock, The Big Bang Theory, and watched pretty much every nerd show on television. And the same guy who was aware of Sabrina the Teenage Witch, Hannah Montana, and reality television shows, comes a new web series where pretty much anything can happen in this insane international comedy.

This is the script for Episode 4 of Life On Camera. I'm currently planning for the first season to contain six episodes and will be online in March. Because of the self-referencial nature of the series it may prove handy to read previous scripts to get a better understanding of the series, and the links are provided below. PLEASE RATE AND REVIEW, if at all possible. I would be highly appriciate it and will provide GP accordingly based on how effective the review is. I'm very interested in what people think about the script, particuarally whether or not it is funny, as well as constructive criticism and if anyone has any suggestions I am more then happy to hear them.


Please be advised that there is course language and suggestive and sexual dialog present within the script.

Episode One: Pilot "Life On Camera: Web-comic Pilot" 

Episode Two: The Deep End "Life On Camera: Web-comic Episode 2" 

Episode Three: The Chocolate Bomb Overreaction "Life On Camera: Web comic Episode 3" 

Life On Camera: Web-series Episode 4: The Adhesive Removal
Written and Created by Richard Bay

Ninja Craft Productions
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Main Cast:
==========================
-          April (the main character of the show who is a witch, April is usually pretty sarcastic and bitter about everything, but she loves comic books, sci-fi shows and various other nerd things.)

-              Lena (The new girl at the school, and a member of a secret organization within the US government known as  SHADOW, Lena's job is to watch over April to make sure she doesn't misuse her powers.)

-          Chloe  (April’s best friend who assists April with all of her spells and witchcraft. Not actually a witch herself,  she used to be one of the popular girls but now hangs out with April and the nerds.)

-          Marcus (April’s neighbor and friend, Marcus is the straight man of the group who  usually doesn’t say or do anything to offend anyone.)

-          Todd (The fat obese character, who’s the most nerdy, socially inept of the group.)

-          Jeff (The sarcastic loud mouth, who cheats and manipulates his way through everything.)

-          Paul (Usually has nothing on his mind, like literally nothing.)

-          Takeda (The executive producer of Life on Camera, and one of the biggest executives at JBC.)

-          Nagano(Takeda’s assistant and number two man producing Life On Camera)

-          Rich Cameraman (The cameraman who follows April’s around capturing her life on camera.)

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TRANSCRIPT: Life On Camera Episode 4 The Adhesive Removal
==========================
Scene: Takeda’s Office (April and Takeda are talking in the office)

Takeda: Well, we’ve collected enough footage and we will begin airing the show in two weeks.

April: Two weeks? That’s pretty quick!

Takeda: Yes, but the top executives want this show on the air as soon as possible. Our new for this season are doing beyond horrible.

////////////// Cutaway: I Survived and American Game Show
Scene: Japanese people on Are you Smarter than a Fifth Grader?

Host: Alright, now if you get this question right, you will win 1,000,00 million dollars, which is a lot more than a million yen. Now the question is, how many sides does a trapezoid have?

Bored Contestant: The answer is four.

Host: Congratulations! You’ve just won a million dollars on I Survived An American Game Show! That means that (looks and sees all of the contestants have won and his expression quickly changes) all twelve contestants have won a million dollars. (to the producers) This game doesn’t work! Who the hell thought this up?! It’s too easy!

////////////// End Cutaway

Takeda: So, the sooner we get the show on the air the better.

April: So what’s the name of the show anyway?

Takeda: Uh…we are still working on that.

April: What do you mean that the show doesn’t have a name? You said the show is going to air in two weeks! Aren’t you going to promote it?

Takeda: Our writers have been stumped regarding what to call this ‘unique’ show. Quite frankly, we have been promoting it based on playing on people’s naturally curiosity.


////////////// Cutaway: Television Promotion For The Show

Announcer: Coming this spring to Japan. It’s been critically acclaimed by every major publication in Japan. The most famous actors of the world have said “Damn, I wish I could be on this show.” It’s even been referred to as a show that may very well be better than the second coming of Jesus Christ. But what is this show? Coming This Spring To JBC.

////////////// End Cutaway

Takeda: We are stuck in deciding between ‘Super Time Happy American Fun Show!’ or ‘Hey! Crazy American Party Hour!’

April: That’s what you’re deciding between?

Takeda: It sounds better in Japanese. Now I do wish to give you something before you go back to America.

April: Ooh! Really? What is it?

Takeda: You’re very own studio audience. (turn to reveal studio audience)

April: Have they been here the whole time?

Takeda: They are good at being discreet, unless you say something funny.

April: We don’t need a studio audience. The best shows don’t need them.

Takeda: April, the traditional American sitcom has always relied on the studio audiences. The best shows have always had one.

April: Arrested Development didn’t.

Takeda: Well, there is a reason why it was canceled. (audience laughs) You see? It lets people know when they can laugh, because the average television viewer has their brain cells too fried to be able to know when to laugh without their help. (audience laughs)

April: That’s true but it just seems to lowbrow. 

Takeda: Of course right, you the sixteen year old high school student who spend her days trying to get out of sixth period by faking various illnesses tell… (audience laughs. Takeda pauses) …tells the network executive who has proceeded over at least twenty different shows such as ‘Mr. Pants; Goat Farmer’, and who… (audience laughs. Takeda pauses) …who clearly doesn’t understand anything about good American sitcoms, like ‘Two and ½ Men’. (audience laughs. Takeda pauses)… Why don’t you start making all …(audience laughs. Takeda pauses)…

April smirks as Takeda appears frustrated.

Takeda: I see your point. (to the audience) You’re all fired! (audience leaves angrily) That apparently was a pointless endeavor.

/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////I
Scene: April’s Basement. April, Marcus, Todd, Chloe, and Lena are all sitting on couches in front of the television with Xbox controllers.

Marcus: Well, I just got the call from Paul. He’s stuck at home babysitting his brother, so it’s just the seven of us for game night tonight.

Lena: Huh? But there’s only five of us here. Unless, Rich are you playing?

Rich: Yeah, I figure we have enough filming done for the week. I can just take it easy tonight and unwind by killing space marines.

Lena: So how do you get seven Marcus?

April:. (hold up a little speaker) Jeff, do you have your stupid system set up yet?

Jeff: (over the intercom) My system is not stupid! It is the greatest thing created since wireless internet

Lena: Why is he on an intercom system?

Marcus: We rigid it up so that Jeff could play games from his home and communicate with us without actually being here.

Todd: I can’t blame him too much. If my parents had a sixty inch television, I would ditch you guys too.

Marcus: I’m just going to ignore that and preserve the friendship.

Lena: So why don’t we play at Jeff’s house on his enormous television then?

Todd: There are several reasons. The first being Jeff doesn’t have effective seating to accommodate us all and I will not sit on the floor as it is bad on one’s back. The second being, you can tell the pixilation on the television when the images are far bigger. The third is that utilizing Wii-motes is far harder to do when the area is so large, and my arms get tired.

Jeff over intercom: And the most important one being we have to hear him whine, so we do it like this.

April: (to Lena) We alternate every week between what we play. This week it’s Halo 3: ODST. Next week, it will probably be Modern Warfare 2, and then the next week it will be Smash Bros. Brawl. And it pretty much alternates between the three.

Lena: I think I’ll just watch for now. I’ve never really played any kind of game before.

Todd: No games? What the hell is wrong with you?

April: She’s got a life, unlike you.

Todd: I have no problem with that.

////////////// Cutaway: Lena Interview

Lena: I’m not really sure about all these videogames and comic books and stuff, but April seems to like it so I may as well give it a try. It beats the people I hung without at the witch slaying academy. For example, my best friend for the last three years, used to cut the eyes out of men in magazines.

////////////// End Cutaway

April: So let’s see, I guess I will team up with Jeff on the LAN cable so that we will get less interference from the cable. Chloe are you fine with pairing up with Marcus?

Chloe: Huh? Oh yeah! Yeah, of course I mean, why would I have problem with that? I think it would be… okay.

////////////// Cutaway: Chloe Interview

Chloe: The other day Marcus and I had a little awkward moment (flashback to episode three when the two of them kiss) It was a little awkward, and it’s been a little awkward between us since.
////////////// End Cutaway

April: Okay… and Rich your punishment for filming me while I was in the shower this morning is that you will have to be Todd’s partner.

Rich: The savage beating I got afterwards wasn’t punishment is enough?

April: Not even close. Enjoy.

Todd: Just follow my every word and do everything I say and we will win.

Rich: Okay sounds good. (selects a blue Spartan)

Todd: Oh dear god.

Rich: Hm?

Todd: There is no map in any Halo game where a blue Spartan is anywhere close to an effective close to an effect camouflage. Quite frankly, you would find it more effective to paint an enormous bulls-eye on your back.

April: Like I said, enjoy.

The doorbell rings from upstairs.

April: Oh, that must be the pizza. Rich make yourself useful and retrieve the pizza.

Rich: Fine, fine. (goes upstairs and opens the door. The pizza deliver’s face is covered by a hat.) Okay, so what do I owe you?

Pizza Deliver: You owe me at least one hundred of these lover boy (grabs him and passionately kisses Rich. As this happens the hat falls off the deliver revealing a very attractive woman)

Rich: (pulling away terrified) Oh my God! Cynthia?! How the hell did you find me?!

Cynthia: Oh, Rich! I knew you didn’t die in that horrible ambulance accident despite what everyone was telling me! Everyone else gave up hope, but I never did! And when I saw you in town the other day I was so happy! I’ve been using global position satellites to track you down over the last forty-eight hours!

Rich: Where the hell did you get global position satellites?!

Cynthia: Oh, I hacked into a government website. It’s totally cool; they weren’t being used for anything important.

////////////// Cutaway: Military Base

General: (watching view of caves of Afghanistan) There he is! We’ve found Bin Laden at last gentlemen! Now all we need is to write down the coordinates and he’s ours! (the view quickly changes to Rich walking down the street. The general falls silent) What the hell just happened?! We were so close! (eyes a billboard) Oh, look! They just opened a Jimmy John’s five minutes from the base! Who wants Jimmy John’s for lunch troops?

////////////// End Cutaway

Cynthia: Oh, why Rich? Why haven’t you contacted me in so long? I’ve missed you oh so much? (grabs Rich again)

April climbs up the stairs: What’s going on Rich? Where’s the pizza? (eyes Cynthia) Who the hell is in my house?

Cynthia: Who the hell is she?

Rich: Uh, this is my…my new girlfriend… yes April is my new girlfriend! Isn’t that right sweetheart?! (puts his arm around April and whispers to her ‘Please play along for the love of god!’)

April: Oh, because this is some sort of classic sitcom where two people pretend to be in love to fool someone else. No, no. We are not doing that. I’m April. Rich here is supposed to be filming my life for a Japanese reality show.

Rich: (whispers I hate you) Yes, dear. The entire project is a secret so that’s why I haven’t called you or anything.

Cynthia: Oh! I knew there was a reason! Uh, my name is Cynthia. Rich is my boyfriend.

April: Oh! So you are the girlfriend that Rich has told me so much about! Well you know you two probably need some time to catch up after not seeing each other for so long.  Rich, why don’t you take some time off and reconnect with your girlfriend.

Rich: But I need to capture every second of your life on camera! I can’t stop even for a second!

April: Nonsense! I insist! You two go do…whatever the hell it is that you two do together.

Cynthia: Oh, thank you so much April. (hugs her) Come on sweetie! We have so much to talk about!

Rich: (to April) I hate you.

April: Yeah, now we are even. (Rich is then dragged out the door. Todd climbs up the stairs)

Todd: So am I to assume that there is no pizza?
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
Scene: April’s Basement

Jeff over intercom: Are we still going to play? What’s happening?

April: Okay, well we’ve just lost Rich for the evening. His girlfriend came over and the two of them are going out for the night.

Todd: More importantly however is that there is no pizza.

Lena: (ignoring Todd) Rich has a girlfriend? Ooh! When did he meet her?

April: About five years ago.

Chloe: Aw, so it’s a long relationship. Wonder what’s been keeping him from tying the knot.

April: Rich faking his death on location for Kill Bill in a horrible ambulance accident and then he hid in Japan so that she wouldn’t find him.

Chloe: That is messed up.

April: Apparently she is bat-crack crazy.

Marcus: And you just let her take Rich? That doesn’t seem right.

April: He’ll be fine.

Todd: Yes, but us on the other hand are pizza-less and down one player.

Lena: I’ll play!

Todd: Please, I’m not having a newbie on my team.

April: Okay fine. I’ll team up with Lena. Todd you are banished to the little television.

Todd: You’re going to team up with her? Ha ha ha!

Lena: And what is so funny Todd?

Todd: You have no idea how complex this game is! With all the intricate combat strategies a game like this involves you can’t possible comprehend them. (Lena then proceeds to kill Todd’s character)

Lena: Uh, that was your guy right?

Jeff: Wow, a headshot!

Todd: You are on my team Jeff!

Jeff: Doesn’t mean I can’t admire a good shot.

Todd: It was luck and quite frankly poor sportsmanship to hit a man standing still… (Lena headshots him again) Okay that’s it! Game on! 

/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
Time passes…
Scene: April’s basement

April: Wow, that’s ten matches in a row Lena!

Lena: That’s good right?

Todd: (throws down the controller) Okay, somehow she is cheating! I don’t know how she’s doing it! But I will find out! And when I do, (gets right into her face) I will destroy you. (storms out of the house)

Lena: Makes you just want to eat him up doesn’t it?

Marcus: Well, I think it’s time to call it a night.

Chloe: Yeah, I’m starting to get tired. And we have class in the morning too.

April: Alright, well then I’ll see you all tomorrow.

/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
Scene: Neighborhood At Night (Chloe and Marcus are walking home together)

There is an awkward silence

Marcus and Chloe: So listen...

The two then fall silent again.

Marcus and Chloe: I was think…

Fall silent again.

Marcus: Is it me or have things been kind of awkward between us since the…you know…

Chloe: Yeah, most definitely.

Marcus: I mean, it’s not like a super-big deal right?

Chloe: No, of course not. I mean we just got caught up in a moment of weakness.

Marcus: Yes, right, of course. I think it’s both best if we just forget it ever happened right?

Chloe: Agreed.

Marcus: See you tomorrow at school?

Chloe: Yeah, I’ll see you in the usual spot. Bye!

Marcus: See you!

The two go separate ways.

////////////// Cutaway: Marcus Interview
Marcus: It’s no big deal. After all, what chance would I guy like me have with her anyway? The nerd never gets the cheerleader; the nerd gets beaten up and thrown into trash cans by the jock that gets the cheerleader. That’s just the way it is.

////////////// End Cutaway

/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
Scene: April’s Room 1:00am. April is sound asleep.

Rich climbs in through the window and without pants.

April wakes up: Jesus Christ, it’s (looks at the time) 1:00 am! What the hell is going on? And where are your pants?

Rich: I had one chance to run and I took it! Oh god!

April: What the hell did she do to you?

Rich: Oh it was awful! She just wouldn’t stop talking about all the things that she does every day, and then she started talking about all the things that I’m not doing and how ‘we can work on this fault or that personality trait’.

April: Sounds like a regular girlfriend to me.

Rich: She wants me to regularly donate sperm and be implanted with the sperm every day so it can increase the odds of her being pregnant with my baby.

April: Okay, that may be the creepiest thing that I have ever heard.

Rich: She’s already picking out baby names! For the love of god please help me!

April: It’s simple. Just tell her what you should have told her three years ago. Just tell her ‘I’m breaking up with you’.

Rich: It’s not that simple.

April: It is that simple. Now you go back out there and you tell her that you two are broken up.

Rich: Alright, if you think it will work, I may as well give it try. (climbs back out the window)

Time Passes. It is now 4 am and Rich climbs back in through the window and wakes April up.

April: It took you three hours to break up with her?!

Rich: Not exactly…

////////////// Cutaway: Cynthia’s House

Rich: Listen, uh, Cynthia. We need to talk.

Cynthia: Oh my god! This is the talk isn’t it? You’re breaking up with me, aren’t you?!! (becoming more and more hysterical)

Rich: No! No! Of course not! I would never think of doing that!

Cynthia: (immediately her mood changes back to crazy) Oh, thank god. I mean I would have no idea what to do if you ever left me. I mean I would probably stalk you for weeks, hunt you down and make clothing out of your skin. So what is it you want to talk to me about?

Rich: Uh….

////////////// End Cutaway

Rich: We had sex.

April: For three hours?

Rich: Five times.

April: Is that supposed to make you less stupid?

Rich: I know! I’m stupid and a coward and weak! (starts crying)

April: Come on, get up. We’re going to the Fortress. I’ve got something in mind that you could use.

/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
Scene: Fortress of Solitude (April is raiding her potion closet

April: Okay, drink this. (hands Rich a small potion vial)

Rich: What is it that I am supposed to drink?

April: It’s essence of bad boyfriend. Those who are attracted to you will feel the pain of 100 broken promises, 50 hurtful comments about their appearance, and 10 wolf howls at other more attractive women, for good measure.

Rich: Sounds like pretty powerful stuff. But, why exactly did you make something like this in the first place?

April: Just the result of some things that I’ve experienced.

Rich: You? Dating? That doesn’t seem like you.

April: So I can’t date and have my feelings be hurt by guys?

Rich: No, I’m just saying, you seem more like the ‘Don’t get upset, get even’ type of girls.

April: Well, I didn’t say I didn’t.

Rich: There’s the girl I know. (looks at vial) So I just have to drink this and I’m free?

April: Free as a bird.

Rich: Sweet! (chugs it down)

A voice from outside calls: Oh, Rich are you in there?

Rich: Oh, crap! It’s her! How did she find me?!

April: I’m more curious as to how yet another person has found the entrance to my fortress of solitude.

Cynthia walks in: Oh, Rich! (runs up and hugs him) I wonder where you went! I’ve been so lonely without you! Thank god, I put that tracking device on you!

Rich: Wait you did what?

Cynthia: Oh, you know silly! When we were doing that thing where you put your hand in my…

April: Okay! That’s a little too much information!

Cynthia: What’s wrong with a Cookie-jar? Rich loves macadamia nuts cookies. I simply had to put the tracker inside one of them.

Rich: (To April) Why the hell isn’t it working?

April: Hm… it’s possible it’s true love. We may have to resort to more drastic measures. Cynthia, would you like something to drink?

Cynthia: Oh, sure! Do you have anything cherry flavored?

April: Oh, I think I have the perfect drink. (grabs a red colored potion from the shelf and puts it into a soda bottle.) Here, drink this.

Cynthia: (she takes it and drinks it.) Kind of fizzy. (she then immediately passes out)

Rich: Oh my god! I didn’t say kill her!

April: Relax; it’s just something to knock her out for a little bit.

Rich: You know, we should really make like handle signals or something to tell what you are going to do, because I cannot continue to be this stressed out!

April: (ignoring Rich) We just need to figure out who to get her attached to now, so she’s out of your hair. Hmm… how about Jeff?

Rich: Why Jeff? Can’t we send her to someone in Antarctica?

April: Well I figure Jeff would be interested in any hot girl that would talk to him, but also it would be good to keep her close in case she would relapse.

Rich: Sure, Jeff it is.

April: Alright, I’ll proceed with the incantation then… You who has a heart with love like no other. Now is the time for you to love another. No matter how great the bond once was between you, Jeff Alderstein you will stick to like glue.

Rich: Is it done?

April: Yep, she is now head of heels in love with Jeff. Now, help me drag her out of here.

/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
Scene: Raven High School Cafeteria before School. Lena is sitting down at a table reading a book.

Todd walks over and taps her on the back.

Todd: Good morning Lena.

Lena: Oh, good morning Todd.

Todd: You will be happy to know that I have talked to my friends in the audio visual department and we have rigid up Halo ODST upstairs.

Lena: Oh, that’s great Todd, but I think I’m just going to sit here and read if that’s alright.

Todd: I assumed you might say that. You see what you had last night was a fluke. I have been up all night training to make sure that doesn’t happen again. It makes sense that you would be so nervous to fight me again.

Lena: Oh, so that’s your tactic? Trying to get me enraged so that I’ll play you again?

Todd: Is it working?

Lena: Yeah it is. Let’s go game boy.

////////////// Cutaway: Todd Interview

Todd: I like Lena, to the extent that I like any person, which really isn’t a lot. But pride was hurt yesterday, and if that means that I’ve got too completely and totally destroy her, so be it.

////////////// End Cutaway
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
Scene: Cafeteria before School. April and Rich walk in to school to see Cynthia with her arms around Jeff.

April: Well it seems to have worked so far.

Rich: Yeah, it has.

The two of them walk over.

April: Jeff I didn’t know you knew Cynthia!

Cynthia: We just met this morning! And I knew that it was love at first sight!

Jeff: Yes love at first sight! (whispers under his breath) She is freaking hot! It’s awesome!

Cynthia: Would you care for a cookie sweetheart? (grabs a cookie jar from under the table)

Jeff: Why yes indeed I’d love one? (takes a cookie out)

Rich: (sighs) She used to let me reach in and take cookies…

April: Is that some sort of inside joke or something? I really don’t get it.

Rich: No, she would let me reach in and get a cookie from the jar. It’s not abstract at all.

April: Why does it sound so dirty then?

Rich: (ignoring April) Can I have a cookie Cynthia?

Cynthia: Oh, I’m sorry Rich. But these cookies are only for the man I love. Isn’t that right Jeff?

Jeff: Yeah, sorry dude. These cookies are just too darn good! (the school bell rings) Oh, damn that bell. I’ll see you after class baby.

Cynthia: Alright, give me a kiss before you go?

Jeff: Of course. (the two passionately kiss while Rich watches)

/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
Scene: Hallway walking to class

April: Well you got what you wanted. She’s out of your hair finally.

Rich: Yeah...she is…isn’t she?

April: You’re not happy?

Rich: Well, it’s just weird seeing her with another man and doing all the things that she used to do to me.

April: Just get her out of your head. How’s this? Why don’t you take the day off and go into town. You never know, you might meet someone who is not completely and totally crazy.

Rich: You’re sure?

April: Yeah, there are plenty of other fish in the sea after all.

Rich: Thanks April. (walks off to go into town)
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
Scene AV LAB: Todd and Lena are playing and Lena just won for the 15th consecutive time.

Lena: And looks like I won again Todd.

Todd: Best of 32!

Lena: Forget it Todd, I’m better at this game than you and you just have to live it. Also, I think we were supposed to be in class, like 2hrs ago.

Todd: I will not live with it! Mark my words! (gets right into her face) I will utterly destroy you at this game. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, maybe not before they perfect the technology to put a human brain into a robot body, but I swear to you that one day I will defeat you, and bathe in the tears that flow from your defeated eyes! (storm out of the room)

Lena sits in silence for a few moments then looks at her watch

Lena: Yeah, definitely supposed to have been in class two hours ago.
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
Scene: Town; Rich is walking alone down the street

Rich: I’ll just meet someone new; someone who can get my mind off Cynthia. After all she drives me absolutely crazy when I am around her. But, she does let me have all the cookies I want, and she genuinely cares about me. No! Just get her out of my mind! (the people he walk by start to have Cynthia’s face) Ah! (sees another) Ah! (sees another) Oh God! What have I done?!
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
Scene: Cynthia’s apartment. Rich rings the bell frantically and Cynthia answers the door.

Cynthia: Oh, Rich. What are you doing here?

Rich: Oh Cynthia! I’ve made such a horrible mistake! I should have never turned your love away!

Cynthia: What are you talking about Rich? I mean, I know you and I were dating for a while but in all honesty I just never really felt anything for you.

Rich: I know, and that’s my fault. But I want you to love me again! (reaches into his pocket, gets down on one knee, and pulls out a wedding ring) Cynthia, will you marry me?

The spell seems to stop working immediately.

Cynthia: (starts crying) Oh yes Rich! Yes of course I will marry you! Oh my god! (stops crying immediately) Now I do have some ideas about the wedding. Well actually, more like several clearly laid out plans and scenarios for our wedding. Now, I’ve already gotten my wedding dress and I’ve frozen all of the food for the reception for the past three years, which should still be good. Not to mention the wedding cake of course, that was the biggest one that they had at the time though I should probably check to see if they now have a bigger one…

Rich: This may have been a mistake…
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
Scene April’s Room: The day of the wedding, or five days from the previous scene

April: I can’t believe you went back to her.

Rich: I was weak. I was so weak! What the hell am I going to do? If I marry her she’s going to drive me crazy forever! And if I call it off, god knows what she would do! Wait, that’s it! April, you can kill Cynthia. You have my permission!

April: What?! I’m not doing that!

Rich: Well you had no problem killing Arganus and getting a Japanese reality television show out of it!

April: I’ve kind of been trying to cut back on the anger; it’s not the healthiest life style.

Rich: Well, you picked a hell of time to become Miss goodie two-shoes!

April: Well if you’re going through with it we gotta go to the church.

Rich: Yeah alright.
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
Scene: Chapel. Marcus, Chloe, Todd, Jeff, and Paul are already there.

Jeff: Ah, to think that I could almost have been the one to marry that fine chick.

Paul: I haven’t been around this episode, but you would have had no chance with someone that hot.

Jeff: Oh yeah? I had my hand in her cookie jar just the other day!

Marcus: Doubtful.

Chloe: Not likely.

Lena: Never would happen.

April and Rich walk in

April: Hey, you all made it. Uh, did someone tell Todd to come?

Lena: No one’s seen him in days.

////////////// Cutaway: Todd’s Room. Todd is now sporting a full beard and has been up for multiple days’ straight playing games.

Todd: I will defeat her! I will defeat her! She will not defeat me again!

////////////// End Cutaway

Jeff: In all honesty, we really haven’t been looking too hard for him.

The intro to ‘Here Comes the Bride’ starts playing.

Lena: Oh the music has started playing! You better get up there Rich!

Rich: Uh, right. (hurries up to the altar)

Cynthia walks down the aisle.

Rich to himself: Well this is it. I’m going to get married to her. I wonder if I just start running if she could catch me. Maybe if I got limp now she’ll think I’m dead. (she arrives at the altar) Oh, god she’s looking at me! I’d better smile. (gives a big smile to her)

Pastor: Dearly beloved, we are gathered together here in the sign of God – and in the face of this company – to join together this man and this woman in holy matr….

An FBI team swarms into the church

FBI Director: FREEZE! Nobody move! Cynthia Lolo, you are wanted for hacking into a top secret government database and utilizing a military satellite for personal use!

Rich to himself: I didn’t see that coming.
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
Scene: Outside of church. FBI agents can be seen with Jimmy John subs. Cynthia is sitting in the back of an FBI swat van in handcuffs.

Cynthia: It looks like we’re going to be separated again my dear Rich!

Rich: Yeah, it looks like we will.

Cynthia: With good behavior, they say I can be out in five years! We can get marries when I get out!

Rich: Of course we can.

Cynthia: I love you Rich! (the door is then shut as the FBI drivers drive off)

April walks over to Rich.

April: Well lover boy, it looks like you got seriously lucky.

Rich: Yeah, I did. (sighs) I miss her already.

April: You need to get your head examined.

Rich: Yeah, most likely I do.

Todd comes running down the street.

Todd: The time for my revenge is neigh Lena!

Lena: Todd? You look like hell!

Todd: I haven’t slept. I have been training for days on end to defeat you and today is the day that I shall!

Lena: Alright, Todd. Let’s just get this over with.
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
Scene: Todd’s House. The two are locked into a tight game. Todd eventually kills Lena and wins the game.

Todd: Yes! Victory is mine! You have been defeated here today!

Lena: Yeah, you really beat me Todd.

////////////// Cutaway: Lena Interview

Lena: I threw the game. I could’ve won sure, but then he would go back into ‘training’ and he would continue to become more and more crazy. Better to shorten the war by 50 years and save millions of Spartan lives in the process.

////////////// End Cutaway

Todd: Yes! I am back on top as the Master of Halo!

Lena: Congratulations Todd. I’m going to go ahead and let myself out then.

Todd: Are you coming to game night tonight? We are playing Modern Warfare 2 tonight.

Lena: We’ve gotta do this again?!
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
End of Episode 4