Dear Me

Dear ME,

Oh dear, me! Oh my head. How did I get myself into this, and how do I get myself out of this? Another me would kill to be in the position you're pondering, ME, but I can't just ask you rhetorically, "Why me? WHY, ME?!?"

Let me tell you what, ok ME? See, me, I write a blog on WDC. It was loved for a long time because it had a great storyline and lauded for its often irreverent humor. But lately it has become boring and bland because the main storyline was ME chasing after a female. And then I landed the prized female, life has been good, and the blood to my blog dried right up with my single-life. My humor went out the door. I tried a concept that worked for a little while, but my "Studyees" have gravitated away from my blog in pretty much the same fashion that the "taken" life has robbed me from many opportunities to peruse their blogs.

Well, ME, it's apparent you fell for the promises too quickly. You jumped at the first extended straw at the expense of your fan base. You sucked them in, became friends with a lot of them, and left them to dry once you got too busy in your real life. You lost your touch exactly when you lost touch with them, and because of it, now you're me, only, well, I'm me, and you're ME who isn't me anymore.

Yeah, whatever, me. I cuddle and snuggle a lot more than you ever did.

ME, let me tell you, that personal stuff has its benefits, if ya know what I'm winkin' (and I know you do, you emoticon junkie...oh, but only when it suits you). ME, I'm not sayin' you hafta tone it down a bit, but maybe just reach out a little more.

Yeah, like I have time to do that. I got a hot girlfriend screamin' up my spine for attention when I already work 60+ hours a week, It's hard enough as it is to get me some "alone time" to do what I want.

Maybe you should give up the blogging altogether, ME. It's not like your "Studyees" actually read your nonsense anymore. It used to work when you were me, But face it...you don't have the time, energy or patience anymore. At least not for now. Maybe you should take a break and come back not only stronger, but smarter. Perhaps freshen up a bit?

I suppose you're right, me. Oh dear me. Let me ask you this...how do you suggest you and I go about doing this, since it's painfully obvious that this has to end between us? And by "us", I mean you and me, not ME and the fine lady.

I would go out gracefully, ME. I would offer up your best stuff in a restrospective kind of way, and then lay low. I mean, really low. I mean, lower than your CPBE's (comments per blog entry) have gone up. Which, uhhh, shouldn't be hard. And maybe when your work schedule smooths out a little, you can rejoin the fray in a tempo stylistically that suits not only your time, but your blog-buddies' tastes.

Yeah, doubt it, me. Not in this kind of "Instant Information" world. WDC can't even catch up with me on my Blackberry. I can update my Facebook page in seconds, but it takes WDC forever to load. In the "old" days, before "smartphones", I could update my blog from my bed using a cell phone, and then head to my local library to get my responses. Now it takes almost 20 minutes to load a page from WDC, and I have to wait like five or 10 minutes after I adjust the font size for it to refresh. Unbelievable!

Yeah, well, I don't know what to tell you, ME. Maybe you just need some time.

Love always,
me