Ballad of Twelve Cents

Ballad of Twelve Cents



by: D.L. Fields







Day 1: My husbands' last paycheck was twelve cents. Unfortunately we have the paperwork to prove it. Why was it so small? First, let me clarify that he's a long-distance truck driver; he gets paid by the mile and when he doesn't move, he doesn't get paid. Second, the truck heater needed repairing, so he had to sit still while that was going on. Next, the holidays; lots of places close for Christmas and New Years. Finally, he had to take some cash advances for tolls, scales, showers, etc.. And let's not forget the $238 per week we're robbed--I mean charged--for health insurance.



Am I worried? You bet your bippy I am. Our finances haven't been this bad since he was out of work for a month, recuperating from gall bladder surgery.



What are we doing about it? First and foremost, he's looking for a different job. He's doing research about a different trucking company and if he likes what he sees, he'll apply there. And me? What am I doing? Well I'm a stay-at-home mom with a young child to care for, so my options are sort of limited.I can't work nights, weekends, school holidays or summer. Forget about a babysitter, I'd be working to pay them. So I'm going to apply for a substitute teaching position at a local school district (catch-as-catch-can work, I know, but it's better than nothing) and I've applied on line to sell Avon.



What I'd like to do is submit short stories to magazines or contests, but I know they're not good enough yet. The dream of writing six hours a day is being taken off the stove for the time being. In the mean time, belts will be worn tightly or sold to pay the bills.



Wish us luck.







Day 2: I'm counting the days on the calendar. Friday is only four days away and I'm hoping we'll have a paycheck--of any size--posted to our account.



The only subject my husband and I have talked about this weekend is his twelve cent paycheck and how pissed he is (as am I) that his employer seems to be phasing out employees. Mike quipped that it would be easier on us if he was just laid off or fired. Unfortunately he's really good at his job and that's not likely to happen. No, I'm not just saying that because he's my husband, I've seen him back into docks, pull loads, unload trucks by himself and get from point A to point B with almost no time to spare.



Have I told anyone about our predicament yet...like my parents? No, no and no. They're in their 70's and have financial and health problems of their own to deal with. Will I ever? Only if absolutely necessary.



Have yet to hear back from the local Avon rep regarding a job. Hopefully I'll hear something today. Until then, I'll make a list of potential clients and places I can leave my booklets.



What really worries me is the lack of health insurance. If my husband gets another job--he was up last night emailing his job history to a potential employer--we'll be without insurance for three months. That means we'll have to cross our fingers and sit absolutely still until it kicks in. No kidding folks; yesterday I counted how many pills I had left in each prescription.



I told Mike that I'm tempted to focus on writing short stories and submit them to contests (that don't have an entrance fee) for money. I'm so proud of him; he said he didn't want to see me give up writing the rough draft of my novel. It's nice to be married to someone who believes in you.



Gotta go.

L.







Day 3: Mike called last night with news: he picked up an application for a local trucking company. He also talked to someone at that company about their insurance; don't know what company it is, but the cost is $100 per week. That's $138 less per week than what's being deducted now. If he gets this job we'd save $552 per month. I wonder how much their dental costs. Mike isn't worried about what insurance company it is, but I'd like to know because I don't want to switch doctors. I remember one insurance company we had told us that our nearest pediatrician was 35 miles away. I told them "No way I'm traveling 35 miles one way with a sick child. Not unless Mr. Scott beams me there."



He would like to give at least a week notice to the company he's working for now. But he said, "Don't be surprised, they may tell me to deliver my load and then come back to the yard and clean out the truck." I wouldn't put it past them. If that happens he'll either stay with his mom for a few days (she lives 200 miles from us) or he'll borrow her car and come home.



Did I mention that this new company would have him home more often? Supposedly. That's what all trucking companies promise, but it's not unusual to be out for a week or more. And they start at .30 cents per mile and cap out at .33 cents per mile. To someone unfamiliar with trucking, that's not much. But it's by the mile and Mike considers a slow week 2500 miles or less.



If he were home more often that would be...weird. He's been a truck driver for 12 years; I'd have to get used to him being home more often. We joke about how after a few days of being on vacation he starts to get on my nerves. But at least he'd be able to attend the school functions in the middle of the week. Hopefully.



Gotta go.

L.



7-5-11



Been a while since I posted, so I thought I'd let you know what's going on.



First, we paid off the Nissan. How did we accomplish this miracle, you ask? We used the 401K money. Our tax guy clucked his disapproval, but he wasn't the one splitting a $360 car payment into two and three payments every month.



Mike's been working this new job for over a year and he likes it...for the most part. The paychecks are averaging $500 and change every week, and they go farther now that we don't have a car payment. Right now the company has more freight than trucks (could be the other way around) so he's been running a lot lately. Some days he comes home just long enough to shower, eat and go back on the road. I'm married to a blur.



Avon's keeping me busy. I'd like to say I'm making the equivalent of a regular paycheck, but I'm not. For that to happen I'd have to have a flea market booth or a downline. The Avon did help to lower our state taxes by $100 or so this year.



We're trying to save up for a new t.v.. Our old one (a year old at the time) got blown up when a lightning strike hit near our house. We're lucky it didn't kill the computer too. We almost had enough saved up, then we had to go to St. Louis three times in a month. It's always something. Sarah hasn't watched Disney since we house sat for my sister last month; she'll live. We're not going to use the credit card. What's the point? We'd be paying enough in interest to buy a smaller t.v. to go with the big one. So we're saving as best we can and we'll pay in cash.



Mike researched pharmacies in our area and found out which ones offer cheaper prices on our prescriptions. Smart man. I'll go to Schnucks for my meds if it means saving $10.



Mike's Nana passed away this year and she willed some property to us. It's a field right next door to my mother-in-law. We'd like to build a house on it (geodesic home) but we're not sure if we can get a loan for the kit and construction. That and Mike's afraid the economy is going to tank worse than it did in '09. So until we can build, we're going to save.



Speaking of money, I have to pay bills today. I had planned on grocery shopping, but that will have to wait until next week.



We were almost taken to court a couple of months ago by a local hospital, to whom we still owed $850. If the pen is mightier than the sword, than a checkbook in my Dad's hand is a nuclear warhead. They mailed a check before I could object.



I'm thinking of getting a part-time job at my daughter's school. At least it would be something and the money would come in handy. I'm sure it would be minimum wage work, and I'm not sure how much that is. At least it would be enough for gas, I hope. That's another thing I stressed over lately, the price of gas. It seems the higher the price gets, the faster it gets used in the tank. Even sitting still costs money.



Mike had vacation a couple of months ago. This is what happened: it rained all week, the t.v. got blown up, we both got sick.



Gotta go,

L.



7-6-11



Am wondering how we can live more frugally than we already are. For clothes I've been going to Goodwill or Salvation Army. Usually I have better luck finding Sarah's clothes there than my own clothes. (Apparently size 16-18 jeans go really fast.)



Earlier this summer I decided it was high time I bought a life insurance policy for myself. Today I had to lower the coverage when I was told that it was going to cost nearly $95 per month for my coverage and a child's rider, too. So instead of $150K coverage, I opted for $100K coverage. That'll save us almost thirty dollars per month.



Took Sarah and her best friend to the pool today. No, it wasn't the water park, but it was still fun. Admission was $3/each, plus $3 for nachos. I could have saved nine dollars and hosed them off in the yard, but sometimes you have to let go of some money to have fun. Or feel like you're in control of your life.



7-8-11



I'm sending a letter to Obama, for what good it'll do me. I'm so disgusted with the way this country is run; rich getting richer by riding the backs of the poor. I won't say "middle class" because there isn't one in this country any more.



I wrote the first draft of the letter last night. I avoided hyperbole as much as possible and just said how disappointed and disgusted I am. This country is going to hell; cuts to social programs while the fucking oil companies get subsidies. They get subsidies and we can't afford to build a house. I know life isn't fair, but sometimes I'd like it to not be fair to some millionaire.



8-20-11



Sarah's elementary school sent home a ream of paperwork; one item was a form for free/reduced lunches. Sarah--who is going through an "I'm nine and know everything" phase--said something about "who needs these?" Two weeks before school started, Sarah got a lesson in humility.



"Last year when we were really bad off, that's what we did, we signed you up for the free and reduced meals. For a lot of the kids in school, this is the only hot meal they eat all day. Maybe the only meal."



Hopefully we won't have to sign her up again this year. We're brown-bagging as much as possible. I make better meals anyway.



I owe the Girl Scout troop eight dollars. The girls (and their parents) went to the local water park and I forgot to bring money. I misread the flyer, it said for parents to pay for admission. I thought the troop was going to pay out of its fund. So tomorrow, I have to pay eight dollars. Every time I saw the troop leader I felt like telling her "I'm not a deadbeat. I'm not a bum."



Mike sent off for his driving report. He wants to see if there are any black marks against him before he applies for a nation-wide company. It will mean less home time, but it'll also mean more money. And we've both said it lately: we're sick of being broke.



Tevye said there's no shame in being poor, but there's no honor either. Are Mike and I ashamed of being broke? Yes. It's embarrassing and frustrating to tell relatives "No, we can't come up for activity X because we can't afford the gas." And I think it embarrasses other people to hear about our financial situation. Maybe they're afraid it's like leprosy, they'll catch it from us if we get too close. Maybe our reality is too sharp and clear; after all, many people still fund their dream life on credit cards.



I hope he gets the job. Can't think of any reason why he shouldn't. It would be nice to not be broke anymore.



8-29-11



Frustrted, angry, mad, inept, stupid, ashamed. These, and many more feelings, are what I feel right now. It's Monday and I just found out we bounced a check last week. Our phone bill. What I don't understand is why the bank charges money for a bounced check, when they know we don't have any in the account. I guess it's funnier when George Carlin says it. Or maybe it was Gallagher.



I came home to balance the checkbook and found this. We haven't bounced a check in months, not since we switched banks and there was a mix up with the accounts.



The check was a little over $500. Subtract $140 for road money, $50 that I took for cash ($30 of which went into the gas tank--I'll be damned if they'll get all our money,) after balancing the checkbook (two life insurance payments, a bounced check fee) that leaves $169 and change.



We were going to go up to St. Louis this weekend, at least we were hoping. Not anymore. I won't be able to get all the items on the grocery list either. Or get hair cuts for Sarah and I. The only reason we'll be able to buy pants for Sarah is because I hoarded $20.



I'm so mad right now I could cry and scream, at the same time.



10-4-11



Good news! I went to a job interview today! How did this happen, you ask? A lady who works for the school district called and asked if I would be interested in interviewing for an I.E.P. position. Two thoughts ran through my head: I only have one pair of dress pants, and what's I.E.P.?



Individual Education Program. It's a special program that helps kids with developmental delays, behavioral problems, etc., get help during school. I might be working with elementary age kids, or high school kids. I may be helping kids learn social skills (how to get along with others) or help a student take notes in class.



So I had the interview today and the lady asked if I had any questions. I said, "You're going to think I'm crazy, but I don't remember applying for this position." At this point, I expected her to show me the door, but she looked at her paperwork and replied, "No, you're not crazy. You didn't apply for this position. You applied for something else and since we didn't have anything open in that department, we thought you might be a good match for this one."



The program is new and today is the first day they interviewed anyone. It's part-time and pays $7.76 per hour. It's during the summer only, but they do have a six week program during the summer for special ed. kids.



Whatever money I would make would go straight toward bills.