Lies

The Doctor forgave me for what I done. He understood, He had unintentionally hurt me, but in the back of my mind, I still knew he was just a lie. made existant by my fear.

My fear of what?

My fear of him.

And now, I feel bound by my fear, like it will never release.

Like I'm sealed away in a dungeon of sorrow. I try to fight this fear, but for what? The chance to be lied to again?

Bound at every limb by my shackles of fear
Sealed with lies through so many tears
Lost from within, pursuing the end
I fight for the chance to be lied to again

Why can't I break free? My life is my own!
I lost in this lie, please let me go.

You will never be strong enough
You will never be good enough
You were never conceived in love
You will not rise above

Will I ever be strong enough? My mind tells me no.
Will I ever be good enough? Again no.
My mind also tells me, I was not conceived in love. Nor will I rise above.
I ask you Doctor. What do you want from me?!?!

They'll never see
I'll never be
I'll struggle on and on to feed this hunger
Burning deep inside of me


Don't you see?
I'll never be what you want? I struggle to to rid myself of this. I'm not who you're trying to make me be. I'm not this girl anymore, Not the girl that loved you. I am not that girl, I won't ever be that girl. not now, nevermore.

But through my tears breaks a blinding light
Birthing a dawn to this endless night
Arms outstretched, awaiting me
An open embrace upon a bleeding tree

I look up through this lie, a light breaks the surface. Bringing with it, the sun. I see him waiting for me. Arms outstretched, acting as if everything was alright, and its okay. I can tell he's waiting for me.

Rest in me and I'll comfort you
I have lived and I died for you
Abide in me and I vow to you
I will never forsake you

He asks why I resisted him. I don't want to tell him. He takes me in his arms, and embraces me. three words leave his lips, they almost frighten me.

"I forgive you."

I rest my head against his chest, the warm feeling I receive.The world starts spinning, us at the center of it.

They'll never see
I'll never be
I'll struggle on and on to feed this hunger
Burning deep inside of me

Faster it spins, soon it's a blur of life. and color. I feel his embrace weakening, I see him being pulled farther, and farther away from me. Our hands reach for eachother, but were already too far away, and soon to the other, we disappear.

They'll never see
I'll never be
I'll struggle on and on to feed this hunger
Burning deep inside of me

I'm back in my home, on the sofa seem scenerio when I first met him, only not, hes not coming back, I won't ever see him again. I toss the book, and start sobbing, how could have this start? Why did it start?

Rest in me, I'll comfort you
I have lived and died for you
Abide in me, I vow to you
I will never forsake you

I hear a voice in the back of my head tells me that everything I experienced was a lie, nothing was real, he never existed.

But then I hear his voice. Telling me not to hold on to him, to move on. Continue as if we never met. to push every memory of our encounter to the back of my mind. But I can't, because we met.

Our paths are forever intertwined.

They'll never see
I'll never be
I'll struggle on and on to feed this hunger
Burning deep inside of me