The Drowning

I feel so cold;
I fell so tired.
I cannot rest;
I do and I will drown.

lake cannot be seen;
Only felt when I lay
It suffocates me,
Till I swim away.

I wish for a challenger
For my hands to go against.
Perhaps I wish for death;
But it fails to grasp me.

I wish and wished;
yet the challenger is already there.
I cannot use my fists
Cause this enemy isn’t the one.

No, I couldn’t do it
Even if I did wish her pain.
But I don’t, not even a little bit
Yet mine still goes on.

Maybe I’ll drown
And let it all end.
No that is the easy way,
We all know it cannot be.

I cannot give in,
It wouldn’t be my style.
I will fight on,
And not let the lake take me.

But the pain will be there,
As I can see my beating heart
It has sunk to the bottom,
And all but retrievable.

I stand on the banks,
Watching the lake rise.
I feel driblets of water,
Filling my eyes.

I have built this lake,
Out of my soul.
It took blood and sweat,
But mostly,
It took all my tears.