B.O.B and the Beanstalk

Inside the Monster Hangar there were colourful balloons everywhere. There was also a large cake in the middle of the room. B.O.B was wearing a party hat and he was somewhat jumping up and down with excitement. All the monsters were there for him Doctor Cockroach, Missing Link, Susan and Butterfliosaurus. They were also wearing party hats. It was as if this was a giant birthday party for B.O.B
“Happy Capture Day,” said the monsters to B.O.B
“Yay,” replied B.O.B. He then blew out the candles. Without hesitation he then ate the cake in one gulp. Everyone watched as it dissolved into B.O.B but he didn’t notice anything wrong. “This is the best Capture Day ever.”
“I don’t understand what exactly is Capture Day?” replied Susan. She was sitting down a couple of metres away from B.O.B.
“Will you know when you have a birthday to celebrate the day you were born,” replied Doctor Cockroach.
“Yes.”
“Well Capture Day is the day we celebrate the day we got captured.”
“That’s not really something to celebrate.”
“I know but it was one of the few things we looked forward to in the year.”
“Story time!” shouted B.O.B.
“And I forgot to say,” replied Doctor Cockroach still talking to Susan. “Every year we give B.O.B a story.”
“What kind of story?”
“Normally a fairy tale.”
“And it’s your turn this year Doc,” replied Missing Link.
“Shouldn’t it be Susan’s turn?”
“No it’s your this year.”
“Sigh very well.”
“Yay Story Time!” cried B.O.B.
Everyone waited in expectation for Doctor Cockroach’s story. B.O.B in particular was very excited. He could barely contain his excitement. He was crawling up the walls and onto the ceiling. He then dropped down onto Butterfliosaurus and then onto the ground right next to Doctor Cockroach.
“Ok gather around everyone.,” said Doctor Cockroach. “This year we have Little Red Riding.”
“Heard it,” replied B.O.B.
“The Three Little Pigs.”
“That one too.”
“How about Jack and the Beanstalk?”
“Ok not that one.”
“Fine once upon a time somewhere in England. There lived a young man called Jack.”
“No B.O.B. A blob called B.O.B.”
“Ok B.O.B.”
B.O.B lived in a small house on a hill. Sadly B.O.B was very poor. So poor that he was running out of food. The only possession of value he had was an old cow who had stopped producing milk.
One day in his desperation B.O.B took the cow to market to be sold. But on the way he met a little old man. The man looked to be poor himself. But he took a great interest in B.O.B’s cow. The cow wasn’t much but it still got the old man’s attention. He was probably looking at his next dinner.
“That’s a fine looking cow you’ve got there,” said the Old Man.
“Yep this pig is everything,” replied B.O.B.
“It’s a cow.”
“No it’s a pig. Can’t you tell by its udders?”
“Ok how much do you want for your ‘cow’?”
“Five.”
“Five what?”
“I don’t know. What’s money nowadays?”
The old man saw that B.O.B wasn’t too particularly bright so he thought of a way to trick him out of his cow.
“Beans,” said the Old Man.
“Five beans,” replied B.O.B.
“I have five beans. But because I like you I’ll give you five magic beans rather then the regular.”
“Magic beans?”
“Yes with them you can wish for anything you want. Money, power, land.”
“A pig?”
“Yes you can even wish for a pig.”
“Sold.”
The Old man then handed B.O.B five magic beans and he walked away. The old man watched as B.O.B walked away. He couldn’t help but laugh.
“What an idiot,” he said to himself.
B.O.B continued to walk until he got home. But when he got there the beans slipped out of his hand and landed on the ground. But before he could pick them up the beans dug themselves into the ground out of B.O.B’s reach.
Disappointed B.O.B just went to bed hungry. He thought that he lost his chance to get himself a cow. But that night the beans began to grow. They grew upwards into the sky further then the eye could see. For now B.O.B was completely oblivious to what was happening.
“What does oblivious mean?” asked real world B.O.B.
“It means you don’t know what’s happening,” replied Doctor Cockroach. “Now as I was saying…”
The next morning B.O.B woke up to find a giant beanstalk outside his house and he looked up at it. Since B.O.B wasn’t very bright the only thing he could think of was going up it and finding out what was up there. Most people would have left it alone. But not B.O.B.
Without hesitation B.O.B began to climb up the beanstalk. But as he climbed higher and higher he tried to look at his house. But after a while he had climbed so high that he couldn’t see it anymore.
It took B.O.B a while to reach the top of the beanstalk. But what he found there surprised him. He was in front a giant castle. He had never seen a building so large before in his entire life. Most people would have gone back down the beanstalk. But B.O.B instead climbed up the steps and squeezed himself under the giant door.
Inside he saw a giant room. There was a kitchen to his left and a table to his right. Not too far away there was a giant set of stairs. But B.O.B could smell something good. He crawled up the leg of the table and saw a roast dinner. B.O.B couldn’t resist in eating it.
But half way through he began to hear giant footsteps. He quickly hid under the table and saw a giant man come down the stairs.
“What was his name?” asked real world B.O.B.
“Whatever you want,” replied Doctor Cockroach.
“Susan.” Suddenly the giant man turned into Susan… She was still wearing his clothes but she began to look at her hands. “And how tall was she?”
“I don’t know forty foot?”
“No way Susan’s taller then that.” Suddenly Susan had a small growth spurt. “Taller.” Susan grew once again. “Taller.” She grew once more but this time her head struck the ceiling of the castle.
“Ouch,” said Story Susan.
“B.O.B I think she was fine the way she was before,” replied Doctor Cockroach.
“Can she still be Susan?” asked B.O.B.
“Fine.” Susan then shrunk back down to her previous height. She rubbed her head in some pain after hitting the ceiling.
Anyway Susan looked at what was left of her dinner and she wasn’t too happy. She knew that she hadn’t eaten that much. She began to look around and she began to sniff for anything.
“Fee Fi Fo fum,” said Susan. “I smell the ooze of an Englishman.
She couldn’t pinpoint where it was coming from so she just sat down and ate the rest of her dinner. B.O.B was directly above Susan’s right knee. He just looked at it in amazement.
But before he could do anything Susan stood up and walked into the kitchen. She picked up a small box and a large cage. Inside the cage was smaller version of Butterfliosaurus. But B.O.B couldn’t see what was in the box. He began to become very curious and you know what they say. Curiosity killed the cat.
B.O.B couldn’t resist in taking a better view of what was in the box. He crawled up out of sight and he saw Susan take two things out of the box. There was a goose and a golden harp.
“That’s boring,” said real world B.O.B. “Why not make it a golden electric guitar and a goose with a cockroach head.”
“Fine,” replied Doctor Cockroach.
The harp then turned into an electric guitar with the head of the Missing Link. The Goose’s head transformed to that of Doctor Cockroach’s.
Anyway Susan placed the goose and electric guitar on the table and she asked them to play for them. The Electric Guitar began to play a solo and it caused the goose to lay golden eggs. She liked what she was seeing.
“That’s great fellas,” said Susan. She then gave out a yawn. “I’m getting kinda tired. You don’t mind playing me something to help me sleep.”
“Of course,” replied the Electric Guitar.
He then began to play a lullaby and slowly but surely Susan began to fall asleep. In a couple of minutes Susan dropped off to sleep and the Guitar stopped playing.
B.O.B saw that he could come out of hiding. He walked right in front of Susan but she was asleep and she didn’t notice him. He went up to the guitar and the goose. He was excited to see them.
“Who are you?” asked the Goose.
“Hi I’m B.O.B,” replied B.O.B. “I come from Earth.”
“That place below the clouds?”
“That’s the one. You look bored.”
“Well we don’t really do much,” replied the Goose. “All we do is play music and lay golden eggs.”
“Wanna a change. Come to Earth a lot more interesting.”
“Well its better then up here.” He then turned to the guitar. “Link?”
“I’m up for it,” replied the Guitar.
“Alright we’ll go.”
The three of them slowly made their way off the table. They were being quiet so that they wouldn’t wake the sleeping giantess. They crept quietly towards the door and they thought that it was going to be there lucky day. But then Butterfliosaurus gave out one of his regular roars. This awoke Susan out of her slumber and she saw them trying to escape. The three of them then began to run.
“Hey!” shouted Susan.
Susan then began to give chase to the three of them. They ran towards the beanstalk. Thankfully B.O.B and the others reached it first and they began to climb down. But Susan wasn’t too far behind them. She also reached the beanstalk and she began to climb down it.
B.O.B, Electric Guitar and the Goose climbed down the Beanstalk as fast as they could. Thankfully they were a little faster then Susan and they reached the ground before Susan did.
Not too far away from the Beanstalk there was an axe and B.O.B came up with an idea to save their skins.
“Make it a chainsaw,” said Real World B.O.B.
“Fine a chainsaw,” replied Doctor Cockroach.
The axe then transformed into a chainsaw. B.O.B picked it up and started it up. Susan was still coming down the beanstalk when B.O.B began saw the beanstalk. Susan saw what was happening and she tried to climb back up. But it was too late. It only took B.O.B a couple of seconds to chop the beanstalk into two. It then began to fall to the ground with Susan still on it.
“TIMBER!” shouted B.O.B.
The beanstalk fell to the ground and Susan went straight through the ground. B.O.B and the others looked at the large hole that Susan had left. But now that B.O.B had the Goose who laid the golden eggs and the Guitar he would never have money problems again. He could sell the eggs and make a lot of money that he most likely would have eaten.
“The end,” said Doctor Cockroach.
“That can’t be the end,” replied Real world B.O.B. “What happened to Susan?”
“She died.”
“You can’t kill Susan.”
“Fine she didn’t die. She went straight through the Earth and came up at the other side.”

There were a couple of Australians playing cricket in a field. Just then their peace was shattered when Susan came up trough the ground. She looked at them and gave a small smile.
“Fee fi fo fum,” she said. “I smell the blood of an Australian.
The story then officially ended. B.O.B was still very excited. He was jumping up and down on one spot.
“That was the best story ever,” said Real World B.O.B. “Can you tell me another?”
“Next year,” replied Doctor Cockroach. “And this time it will be Susan’s turn.”
“My turn?” asked Real World Susan.
“Yep so you better start thinking of a good story.
B.O.B was very excited to next year. But by now he had already forgotten the story he had just been told.

The End.