Starbathing

Starbathing

Times there have been many
When I wonder Why?
I sit alone so demanding of the sky
I ask the night if I should cry

It never answers
But I see my life mapped up there
So many points of brilliancy
Littered against an otherwise unaccomplished
         and featureless expanse of nothing

I shred myself in these moments
Have I erred?
Why not a multi-colored cataclysm of heavenly happenstances
         leaving dazzling afterimages
To tell me that John you're on your way

A cigarette helps me to relax sometimes
Aching on a lonely sidewalk at three A.M.
Do you know what you want?
Yes.
What?
Not to relax...
It taxes my pursuit of my desires...