"Pineapple Juice"

                                                Pineapple Juice

      Whenever I drink pineapple juice, it will make me sick to my stomach. In the far reaches of my mind, I remembered that it started so very long ago. I had to sit and think about this for a long time and this is what I remembered.

     I remember when my mother came home from work one day and wanted to know why I looked putrid green. She noticed I had taken two baths and asked me what was wrong.

    My mother always asked questions when it was too late but this is what I remember...

    “Are you sick? What is wrong with you?”

    I answered “Nothing,” but she wasn't satisfied. She kept plugging away until she would get the negative answer that she expected.

    “Your brother doesn't look too good, either. What were you two doing?” Of course my reply was again, “Nothing.”

    My brother was gagging and yelling that his stomach hurt. I went into his bedroom and told him to “Shut up! If you don't, she'll find out and we will both be in big trouble.” He continued incessant moaning and whining. The big sissy!

      My mother decided we definitely were sick from God knows what, threw up her hands and gave both of us some pineapple juice, which I immediately threw up.

      When it was time for bed, she went in to check on my brother who was very busy in his closet. She told him to get in bed and proceeded to shut the door.  Reaching for the handle she saw something fall from above the doorway.  A pack of cigarettes, which incidentally were hers, pissed her off. She announced in no uncertain terms that she would take care of us in the morning.

    We didn't want to get up so early, but she drug us out of bed anyway.  She motioned us to go sit on the sofa.

    Standing in front of us, she took out a pack of cigarettes and gave each of us one. I saw the smirk on her face and she was enjoying it.

    My brother, the fool, yelled, “Thanks, Mom!

    Me? I knew that I could never smoke it. I was still sick from the night before. I pretended to inhale but she knew differently.

    “Inhale as deeply as you can and I mean deep!” she roared.

      I got very sick and was given more pineapple juice. To this day I hate it and when I see it, I remember!

    Did I mention that she bought a very stale pack of cigarettes for the occasion?

Janice Weinberger
March 2011