It Worked Once Before

“Well boss, You see it was a simple locate and lift job,” said Tony as he stood in dim lights of the smoke filled room. “ Honestly any rookie should be able to handle it. That's why we make it the standard initiation operation for the guild. Got to let em make their bones so to speak. And of course it gives a newbie just enough of a taste of what’s to come to wet their beaks. But it doesn't present enough danger of discovery to actually compromise any of our serious operations. Well at least usually. It’s really quite basic.”

“As you know, we let the prospective member pick the location which inevitably ends up being a house not to far away. We let them case the joint themselves and lay all the groundwork for the heist as they see fit. Meanwhile their “sponsor” will just offer advice and reassurances as to how to proceed. Of course most newbies don’t realize till well after the job’s success that their sponsor had em on the short leash the whole time. But that’s just how it goes.”

“The next step of course is to make sure the target’s preoccupied or asleep during the op. But that’s easy to do, it’s not like it takes any magic fairy dust to keep your average overworked underpaid middle aged person out of the house or sound asleep on a boring weeknight.”

“ Yah, Yah, we all get that Tony, You friggin talk to much. But before you shut your yap why don’t youse explain how you and your Apprentice messed up so me and the boss here can finish this business up,” said the diminutive balding man in the track suite as he pointed to the older business suit clad man sitting next to him at the small bar.

“Okay, Okay sorry Sal,” said Tony brushing a tanned hand nervously through his greased back hair. Then he continued, “ So, like I said. It was all setup. All the rookie had to do was jimmy the lock. Grab the goods and make his getaway. It was all going aces...”

“ Then how’d we end up with her?” replied the boss breaking his silence as he motioned toward the nine year old girl dressed in flower pajamas who towered over them drowsily napping in the corner of the room.”

“ We didn’t know she’d be home boss I swear. All our intel said she was supposed to be at a friend’s sleep over. Honest Boss, I’ve trained countless sock gnomes with not even a whiff of trouble,”replied Tony nervously playing with his gold chain. I would have never sent the kid in to get them out of the dryer if I thought there was any chance he could get pinched by her.”

“ But she knows now Tony.” replied Sal. “ She knows us gnomes are real. What are we gonna do about it? Sooner or later that sleep dust is gonna wear off and then she’ll rat us out to the biggies. How we gonna make a living then? You wanna go back to the small time lifting ball point pens or hiding car keys?”

“ Well what if she don’t tell Sal?” questioned Tony as he shuffled his sneakered feet nervously.

“ How we gonna shut her up Tony? You know the fairy convention don’t allow us to whack her.”

“ Woh, wait a minute Sal. That’s not what I meant. What if we bribe her? We could offer to make her a princess; it worked with that Snow White dame way back when.”
“ You mean make her an accomplice?”muttered Sal as both he and Tony looked at the boss questioningly.

“ Eh why not boys. It worked once before. Besides we got nothing to lose. Now beat it the both of you,” shrugged the boss as he adjusted his long beard and went back to eating his mushrooms.