If I was the sister

If I was the sister who cares for my mother,

I’d be annoyed by the sister who visits sporadically

And never on the same weekday twice

But who sits with our mother and listens to her talk.



If I was the sister who takes my mother home with her

For usually two weeks and more than once a year,

I’d be irritated by the sister who erratically emails

Only when our mother is staying at my house.



If I was the sister who visits my mother daily

Fitting in her shopping between caring for my grandchildren

So my daughters might stay current in their professions,

I’d be disdainful of the sister our mother often praises.



But I am the sister who rarely phones or visits,

Who’s wrapped up in my life and doesn’t make time for mothers.

I am the sister who flits between nuclear and wider families

And who discards lovers and professions while having fun.



I am the person my mother wanted to be

Before she settled for children instead.