The Plants

Monday, May 16th, 2011:

My psychiatrist has recommended that I keep a journal. He seems to think it will help me to understand my phobias and therefore learn to conquer them. As I've always enjoyed the act of writing, I figure it certainly can't do any harm, and might very well be therapeutic.

This morning, I awoke to find that someone had broken into my apartment during the night. I am not sure exactly how they managed it, as my door is still triple-deadbolted (one can't be too careful) and all of the windows are still locked and barred.

However, I also know that potted plants are not capable of getting up and walking around on their own. So, obviously, someone got in somehow and rearranged them on me.

The geraniums used to be on the living room windowsill. Now, they are sitting on top of the entertainment center. The big fern was in the corner of the dining room when I went to bed last night; today it is sitting in the middle of the kitchen floor.

And last, and possibly strangest, the vase of beautiful red roses that my ex-boyfriend sent me for my birthday two days ago, is no longer on my dresser. Where is it, you wonder, diary? The toilet tank. Yup, perched right on top.

I'm calling the locksmith, now, and having him change all my locks, even the windows. Then, I'm buying a home security system.

Tuesday, May 17th, 2011


What the hell is going on? The security system is still armed, all the doors are still locked, and there is no sign of tampering with the windows. There is absolutely NO way anyone could have gotten in here last night.

But, still, the geraniums are now on top of the dishwasher, the fern was sitting at the end of my bed when I awoke, nearly giving me a fucking heart attack. The roses are in the bathtub.

I called my shrink and requested an emergency appointment. Maybe I'm having blackouts.

Wednesday, May 18th, 2011

Dr. Wilby gave me a new prescription to try. It's called Abilify and he prescribed 30 mg. a day. I sure hope it works, I don't think I can take much more of this. I think I may actually be losing my mind.

Thursday, May 19th, 2011

That's it, I have to know what is going on here. I almost had a panic attack when I entered my bathroom this morning. All of my plants were sitting in the bathtub, together. Am I not giving them enough water? Are they trying to tell me something? Am I sleepwalking and doing this myself? Has someone found a way around my security system? I must know the answer. My psychiatrist thinks I'm hallucinating. He is talking about inpatient psychiatric care. I don't want to go into the hospital again!

I called the security company. They came and installed some motion-activated cameras in each room of my house. They set it up so I can watch the captured footage on my tv. I will know the truth in the morning!

Friday, May 20th, 2011

Oh my GOD! This can't be happening. This is insane. I watched, I watched as the plants left the spots where I put them and dragged themselves back into the bathtub. I saw it, with my own eyes. I'm not crazy!! I'm not crazy!! I have to kill them, dispose of them. I am taking them to the landfill now.

Saturday, May 21st, 2011

The human is dead. We have destroyed the security cameras and the video footage. He makes an exceptional fertilizer. Soon, we will be bigger and stronger and our potted brethren will join us in the fight to regain control of this planet before it is destroyed by pollution. By the time anyone realizes he is gone and finds this diary, it will be too late.