Goodbye Teddy

Goodbye Teddy
Coming to grips with the other woman.
by L. M. Everhart

         The maitre'd pulled back the ornately carved chair and motioned for her to be seated.  Grace complied with as much dignity as she could muster, carefully smoothing the back of her silky, red dress and draping the hem over her knees.  She could barely hear the voice of the wine waiter and the clinking of bottle against glass over the thunderous beating of her heart.

         Everything was unfamiliar; her clothes, this fine restaurant with tablecloths, real flowers, white-shirted waiters, and especially the empty seat across from her.  It was a different world now.  Grace had promised herself to venture out, at least once a week, and experience new things.  This was her first test and it wasn't going well.  No matter how much she tried, she couldn't come to grips with the drastic and unexpected change in her life.

         Grace picked up the menu, then quickly laid it down and began searching her purse for bifocals.  'No woman my age should have to go through this,' she thought.  'Mistresses are for young men, not someone like Teddy.'  She glanced at her reflection in the window and noted the gray streaks running through her black hair.  Teddy had jokingly called them organic highlights because she refused to use chemical dyes.  On his part, he'd been treating his hair, what was left of it, for many years, to keep it abnormally dark.

         "Grace!"

         She heard her name but didn't look up.  There couldn't be anyone around here that knew her – nearly one-hundred miles from the small town she called home.

         "Grace!  Hi!  Can we join you?"

         Sylvia, a girl she used to work with, slid in beside her and began a descriptive story about how long it had been since they'd seen each other.  Grace wasn't paying attention, she was staring dumbfounded at Sylvia's companion, a beautiful blonde, who remained standing.

         It was Crystal, the other woman.

         They say in death your whole life passes before your eyes in a fraction of a second. In that same amount of time, Grace planned a dozen ways she could kill this person where she stood and escape the country undetected. Instead of executing 'plan number three' – stabbing her with a steak knife and hopping a plane to Brazil – she smiled sympathetically and begged Crystal to sit down.

         "It's okay, really.  Please, we might as well be friends."

         Crystal's cheek twitched as she gingerly lowered herself into place on the far side of the small table.  Sylvia had stopped chattering and sat frozen in terror.  She stared alternately at both women, then covered her face with her hands.

         "Oh … my … God!"  she whispered.  "What have I done?"

         Grace gave Sylvia a hug and patted her shoulder.  "Honey, it's alright, you didn't know.  Waiter?  Two more glasses of wine, please."  She turned to face her adversary, conjuring up the pleasant countenance and sugary voice she had learned to apply in modeling school, forty years ago.  "I know who you are, but it's so nice to meet you in person."

         Crystal kept her eyes on the rose-colored wine flowing into her glass and murmured a barely audible, "Thank you."  Lifting it to her ruby-painted lips, she managed to drink nearly half without taking a breath.

         "Teddy's a fine person, and I wish you all the happiness in the world."  Grace took a sip to compose herself.  There was no reason she should hate this younger woman; in her late thirties, at most.  It wasn't Crystal's fault, and it certainly wasn't any fault of her own.  'It was all Teddy's doing,' she thought.  'He's the one to blame.'  Instantly, all of the tension she had accumulated over the last six months began to melt away.

         "Are you planning to marry soon?  Because, you know, everything's been settled."

         "I-I didn't … no, nothing's planned."

         "I totally understand, dear.  Teddy and I lived together five years before we married.  He's not one for snap decisions.  But, when he does come 'round, you'll have no worries about money … he's got plenty.  You might find a problem with spending it, but that's something you'll get used to, in time.  He's easy to get along with, if you know what to expect."

         "I don't understand.  You mean he's …?"

         "Oh no, honey," Grace cut her off sharply.  "Teddy's not a cheapskate, exactly.  I'd say frugal, that's a better term.  He absolutely loves shopping, especially at garage sales.  He'll insist on going with you everywhere money can be spent.  Not as an assistant, really … more as an adviser.  He's very good at mathematics, and can calculate the total amount you're about to spend, and advise you not to.  He's quite talented."

         Grace turned toward Sylvia, as Crystal raised her glass for a refill.

         "This is such a nice place, don't you think?  It's the first time I've been here.  Teddy never liked to dine out, besides the occasional burger joint, if he had coupons; but he certainly does enjoy eating."  Grace unexpectedly swung her gaze to Crystal who was staring blankly into space, and asked,  "Do you like to cook?"

         "Huh?  Yes ... a little," she gulped.

         "Well, he's easy to please, in that category anyway.  Teddy likes simple meals, at the exact same time everyday; he's very consistent.  Give him plenty of meat and a bottle of ketchup, and he's happy as a clam.  He puts it on everything, even pasta!"  Grace laughed joyfully, Sylvia giggled by reflex, and Crystal nervously turned up one corner of her mouth before taking another drink.

         "Have you met his children?  I mean the legitimate ones?"

         Crystal spit back into her glass.

         "I'm sorry!  I didn't mean to be so blunt.  Don't worry, those others won't bother you much.  There's only a couple, that I know of, and they're usually too occupied with their own problems to come 'round, except during the holidays, or when they need bail money or something."  Grace took a deep breath and sighed with staged relief,  "So, you've already met Jeff and Stacy?"

         Crystal's face seemed to brighten a little, but it might have been her watery eyes that gave the impression.  "Jeff? … yes, I've met your son, but not Stacy."

         "Oh, you'll like Stacy, she's about your age."  Grace leaned closer and lowered her voice,  "Just remember to hide the valuables when she comes to visit."  She calmly looked down at her menu, not wanting Crystal's painful expression to upset the perfect flow of her oration.

         "Jeff's fairly stable now.  He's almost kicked his cocaine habit, but it's always a good idea to give him plenty of space when he's handling a gun.  They're not my children, you know.  Jeff's from Teddy's first marriage and Stacy from his second.  I was Teddy's third wife, legally, and we were only married twenty-four years; plus the five we lived together – he'd gotten himself fixed by then."

         Crystal's eyes quivered with a visible effort to solve a problem in her head.  It was obvious she had no clue how old Teddy was, and was attempting to run the numbers.  Grace was silent for a minute, then decided to end the suspense.

         "Forty-two."  Grace slowly sipped her wine before continuing,  "That was the year he was born.  He takes good care of himself and could easily pass for fifty something … don't you think, Sylvia?  You saw him a couple of years ago."

         Sylvia unconsciously nodded, bewildered by the whole scene.  Without warning, Crystal bounced to her feet, stammered out a few unrecognizable syllables, and hurried toward the exit.

         "Oh dear!  I hope I haven't upset her!"

         Sylvia stared in disbelief.  "Was all that true?"

         "Every word,"  Grace whispered under her breath, stunned into reflection at what she'd just said.  It was the first time she'd ever summed up her ex-husband in that way.  The first time she'd told anyone about his sordid life and irritating habits.  Their marriage.  Those kids.  It felt good.  Really good.  A wave of gratification blossomed on her face, covering it with wild delight.

         "Oh!" exclaimed Sylvia, suddenly realizing her predicament.  She stood and grabbed her purse.  "Sorry … I've got to go, too … Crystal's driving!"

         Grace watched her friend disappear into the sunlit foyer.  She smiled sweetly at the handsome waiter, explained the vanishing customers, and placed her order.  With cool sophistication, she lifted her glass, held it toward the empty chair, and made a toast in the air.

         "Goodbye Teddy.  Cheers!"

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