lesson 5

Lesson 5 Structure



General:What I’m going to relate now will make you wonder why I didn’t mention it earlier. The reason is that you weren’t ready for it. Some were too overwhelmed by the prospect already of achieving a first draft and others, in their hear of hearts, already presumed to know too much pushed ahead like a tank down a European side street. Either way if you emerged with a first draft you are at the point you need to be. Now with it in front of you reflect on this.



A person has formative events that take place in their lives. Say one every five years. A drama focuses on one of those formative events…ideally the most formative of all in a persons lifetime. Since these don’t happen all that often people are naturally interested when they see them beginning to form in their own lives or in the lives of others. To satisfy this interest they read novels, go to the movies or go and see a theatrical production. These artistic devices use the imagination to trick awareness into believing, that reality is taking place….and allow them to vicariously have an out of body experience to where they experience the life shaping experience of someone else. If the experience is good the drama is called a comedy. If it is bad the drama is a tragedy.



A Drama is a literary construct designed to draw each and every member of the audience out of themselves and allow them for a brief period, to live the event through the eyes and emotions another. It is like the Tsunami of a person’s life. You go to the theater to see the big wave coming, to watch it wash over a central characters existence and see how they emerge from the experience. The trick is periodically show the wave coming to hold the interest of the watcher as they see it coming and prepare to deal with it…first comes a glimpse and then another,….These glimpses are conflicts and they should build the same way the wave does, surging and looming ever larger and closer.



The climax is the wave crashing down…that should come the end of the second scene or start of the third. If the climax comes to soon…or if it so obvious the it can be anticipated the audience or reader imaginative clomps down on it and becomes prematurely satiated…and quits paying attention. That is bad. If the climax comes too late or never arrives at all, the audience is left frustrated and unfulfilled. That is not good. It has to come at the appropriate time. It has to be a snapshot of that hugely significant event in the Central Characters’ life and what led up immediately before and what the outcome was….That is why people go to the Theater and what they expect to see is a life changing formative event.



Now you need to look at your initial draft and ask yourself…is this what my play shows? Will the audience catch a glimpse of that wave….will they see Godzilla towering over the tops of the building coming ever closer and closer. The answer one usually give themselves is “Ya-Ine or Yaine” it’s a German way of saying “Yes and No.“ (Yah…Nine….get it?) I can hear your brain rumbling….Ah come on Percy, I have some of that in my draft…Look here in scene 2... Then, well maybe I could do this or that…”



So that is what you need to do now…Go back and start to tweak to show the wave coming…to hype the crisis….to blow on the coals so the audience begins to get wild eyed with anticipation….see their eyes gleam or hear their little hearts begin to go pitter-pat, pitter pat…no they can’t quite reach the carrot but they’re chomping at the bit….make them begin to salivate.



One of the things I won’t do with this course is to give you a story line or create your characters….I thought about doing this and then rejected it out of hand….If you can’t come up a story or some unique characters you’re going to struggle as a writer. When I say “Come Up” I mean think up a story or have something spin off of some material you’ve read. Shakespeare, had some pretty thin story line materials and look what he did with it. As for characters… well they’re all around you and if you can’t see them, you just aren’t looking…



No let me interject something here that will give some hope to everyone. There isn’t much “thinking up” that goes on anywhere…Most of what is written is variations off a theme that is already well know…



Hesiod, a contemporary of Homers, said there were two types of minds…those that can think up good stuff up and those who know it when they see it. Occasionally a genius has a brain cramp and farts out something new and profound…Einstein did it with E=MC2. I think of “The Gift of the Magi” as the same sort of thing….There are a lot of physicists out there that can grasp the meaning of Einstein’s formula. (I’m not one) But as a writer I can look at the story line of Gift of the Magi and say “Oh my Gawd! He sold his watch to buy her a comb set and she cut her hair to buy him a chain for his watch. Is that a great story line or what?



A great writer on a clear day might stumble onto something truly “Good” stuff….but most of the time all writers tread water in the same pool looking for something half-baked they can adapt to their needs.



In writing a stage play there are some structure and momentum issues. Instead of going scene by scene sequentially, which would be a huge exercise in frustration, this course will break the issues into categories and like a check list, the dramatist needs to look and see if they're included….(they need not all be) and where they are... do they work effectively. achieving the desired end. Do they fit together…are they are recurring and interrelated and if so do they flow into one another is a seamless manner.



With the completion of Milestone 3, congradulations are in order. You put together a crudely wrought end product. But did it really consider and address all the things that would make your production complete? Trust me as the bearer of some sad hard truths…you did not. You might have thought you knew what you were doing when you wrote the first draft but as laudable as the first effort was…. It ain't there yet. You'll soon find it has warts, a hole here a snag there. Don't be discouraged. You are right where you should be at this stage, but while you might consider yourself well along, the oprea isn't over until the Fat Lady Sings....In terms of the play you are writing....it isn't time yet to scribble "The End".



So what the remaining Milestones will do is examine the components or issues shown below. It will be like someone saying….“Did you think of this….did you think of that? If the answer is "No," it be you neglected something that might make your play even better?” This is where we go back in a second edit and see what was missed without rcompletely undoing the whole thing. This is where the tweaking comes in, changes on the margin, some repining, maybe a little hand stitching that will bring the play together in a more permanent fashion.



So take a look at the structure ….go back through the scenes and decide what detracts from the balance and symmetry, are the pieces about where you want them. Where does the material gather and sag and what needs to be done to make this a creation rworthy of a walk down the board walk. These are things it's time to reconsider.

Apartment Life





1. Did the first scene hook the audience?



I am having others to read this so that I can truly have an audience opinion.





Lilly's monolog:



Here is some of what I have added tonight:



I will not wake up the a snowy morning again. I wont have my friends' shoulders to cry on when things aren't going my way. I give them up to live in the sun with my soul-mate.



Sometimes I think that I moved to follow a kiss. I know that I will be happy. In time, I will have the happy ever after that I have dreamed of since I was a child.



Ezra's Monolog:



She raised the three of us, and now she has taken on raising my daughters. I know that she has had it hard while I lived in Kentucky with Lilly. I want to always to be there for my mom as she has always has been for me. She has been my parent, my nurse, and my best friend. I had to come back. I  am obligated to my mother, and could not stand her to battle parenthood again alone.



Do I have to be prepared for when I am left alone again?

I know that she was close to her mom too, and it is going to be even harder to be away from her only daughter. Did I think about her as much as she did me?



Lilly takes Ezra's hand as they walk out of the office. He could see the sparks of both love and fear.



Lilly:



I love you, Ezra. I know that we will do well here. We can do anything as long as we are together.



Ezra:



Right, Lilly. I know we can. We always have.



2. Most good plays are about love or power…is this what yours is about or perhaps you using a different motif.



I think that I started this with more of a love and fear motif.









3. Is there a premise or moral….does that thread continue throughout the drama?



I think that the premise is that this is a family that is there for each other. I hope that this can be seen throughout the play. If not please let me know, and I will work even harder and take suggestions.



4. Does every moment illuminate a take on this theme…could portions be eliminated without diminishing the continuity of the production?



I think that I have centered this play on on family relationship and standing up for one another that a family should have. If you think of any way to better this, I would love to have your suggestions.



5. Dramas have something called a central reflector. It is a pivotal idea upon which the characters all have an opinion….it generates discussion What is the central reflector(s)? How do the characters react to it?



I think that the reflectors in my play are both the compressions of Florida and and Kentucky. Another might be how the upstairs neighbor behave. Lilly is most hostile about them, and Ezra takes a stand against them.



6. Does silence reveal anything…Is something being avoided…does a portentous issue loom large that nobody wants to take on….Is submerged dialogue being used instead , standing in as a proxy because the real issue is too painful to face?



Need help with question.



7. Most plays use repetition and ritual….When it becomes disrupted, frustration ensues and the scene revolves around it.



I think an example of this is when the neighbors interrupts the children playing, and Lilly goes off.



8. Are there layers working beneath layers…plots and subplots which must be integrated and brought along? Is the  audience being made to wonder how these will be reconciled?



9. Does the action become increasingly heated and compressed? Does the story line become increasingly lean taunt and compelling?



10. Is the story flowing like a river following its own course or is it being forced in unnatural ways based upon the playwrights preconceived and initial concepts.?



These thoughts are like a check list the dramatist needs to apply to the scenes at this time to see if they’re present and working and that all the actions are pinned before it gets zipped together on the sewing machine.. In your second edit go back and consider these while the play is still fluid before you begin locking things in cement…When this milestone rolls around we will be discussing these issues and applying them to your play.