The Hangover

Note: This story was an entry for the December 2011 Hawk's Vocabulary Extravaganza Contest. To view the contest rules, click on Contest Rules:

When writing, a great vocabulary can mean the difference between an ordinary story or poem and a piece which will be remembered ---sometimes for years afterward. Each month this contest will present ten words, many of which you will have to look up the definitions, for inclusion in a work of short story or poetry.


Rules:

There must be a minimum of 4 entries in any given month. Anything less will be pushed to the next month's judging.
You must use at least 3 of the 10 words on the vocabulary list each month
Submissions must be made by midnight EST on the last day of the month
Short stories should be 500 to 1,000 words
Poetry must be at least 25 lines long
Only one story and one poetry item can be submitted. You can submit one of each.
You are allowed to edit your piece all the way up to the end of the month
Submissions do not have to be new, but they do need to be original and fit all other rules
Submissions should be presented with the bitem format
All submissions should be rated lower than 18+
A word count is not required, but definitely is appreciated
Most of all, have fun and be creative. Judging will be centered around how seamlessly you insert the words into your piece and the correct usage and, of course, a great story/theme helps too!

Judging will be done by the 15th of the next month.

Vocabulary list for December 2011 

Kvetch                      Perdition
Dour                        Expostulate
Peevish                    Interminable
Vagary                    Quibble
Mosaic                    Subterfuge

"Hawk's Vocabulary Extravaganza" 

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The Hangover

By Indelibleink

"Wally..."

"Wally, my dear..."

"Wally...WAKE UP!"

"Jeez, Louise, you don't have to shout. I feel like I have a hangover to end all hangovers."

"That's because you do have a hangover, Einstein. Last night was New Year's Eve, remember?"

"Oh. I guess I didn't realize that drinking large quantities of alcohol would result in large bumps on the head."

"It does when you go to use the bathroom at a friend's - or should I say ex-friend's - house, then trip and fall and hit your head in his newly remodeled bathroom. Beautiful mosaic tile - it must have cost Steve and Joanie a fortune - and you take a chunk out of the wall with your big, dumb head."

"Okay, okay, already. You don't have to be so peevish about the whole thing; it's not like I started a war or anything..."

"Wanna bet? Steve was willing to let the whole thing go - as a favor to his friend - but you had to stand there and argue how 'If it had been installed properly, your head wouldn't have caused any damage'. You just wouldn't let it go; you had to stand there like an idiot and expostulate for twenty minutes about how Steve should contact the installer and file a claim. I've never seen you in a discussion where you didn't insist on quibbling about some minor detail for one dumb reason or another."

"Oh, yeah...Now I'm starting to remember. Then I think Joanie called me a 'kvetch' or something and it ticked me off..."

"That's because last night when you thought she called you a 'letch', you got real defensive, but I stood up for you."

"Thanks... What did you say?"

"I said that 'Yes, you were an interminable kvetch'."

"Jeez Louise, that was awfully kind of you. Forewarn me next time you're going to stick up for me so I'll know to stick my tongue in a light socket first."

"Listen Pal, if you're going to pester our best friends with your incessant whining, I'll stick up for you any darn way I choose."

"You know, the vagaries regarding the effect of alcohol being what they are, I didn't know I was going to act in the manner I did."

"Oh, I wouldn't say that. You have such a dour personality to begin with, and alcohol is only supposed to magnify those traits. In other words, you merely morphed from crab to super crab."

"That bad, huh?"

"Well, let's just say that if there was any doubt about whether you were ticketed for perdition or not, you erased any questions about that."

"Now I just think you're being bitter and vindictive. I couldn't have been as bad as you suggest."

"Aha! The 'master of subterfuge' has spoken!"

"Whatever do you mean by that? I'll go over and patch things up with Steve and Joanie's right away. I may be dumb, but I'm not stupid."

"You may want to re-think your position, my dear..."

"How's that?"

"You're on their couch!"

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Words: 504