my life as a schizophrenic

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death

blind,sorrow,~0~ never once felt loved,~1~ what shall i do to overcome this?~2~ can i actually deal with this everyday or is death really my option.~3~

why am i so stuck on this,~4~ it begins a fine day and then darkness comes and im crying like a baby over drama.~5~ and considering the fact that im schizophrenic so yeah she never recognizes my pain and understands my plead for her love.~6~ how can she help me if she keeps on pushing mme away  pushing me into a blackhole and killing me i can never tell her how i feel so i just push it away am i really that scared or what?~7~ am i really that weak and why must i hide from the sunlight am i really that afraid to be seen or noticed by someone because she puts me in here.~8~ why am i so crazy my schizophrenia just kills me.~9~ i cut myself and bleed through all the pain and sorrow and i just slowly die,~10~ remeber when we were happy remember when you loved me is it me i am crying hanging on aa thread here. what more do you want.  what more can i say or do to help you and so you can love. this is all i can say is good bye and so long love that i never had is gone. i am gone i am lost i am dead i am the reason i am scared. i am pleading to you till that day comes when you say your sorry i must hide in the darkness till i am able to say how i feel. goodbye