Moses&Curio & The Table For Four pt4

The server laid out their spread and the four killers dove in.  They were well into their plates when Pete, his mouth full of bowtie pasta and sautéed mussels, watched Curio eating.

“I figure a tiny little thing like you’d be pickin’ at a salad.  You knockin’ out dat hog like a women possessed.”

Curio paused, mid-gnaw on a spare rib.  “You got a problem with a coonass woman who eats, Big Love? We ain’t that rare down in deez parts, ya’ know.” She sniffled and returned to her potato salad.

Pete patted his huge belly.  “Naw, lil cheri.  But look at you and Tex.  Fit as a fiddle.  Y’all don’t eat dat much, do you?”

“No, Pete.” Curio fellated the rib bone.  She put on the show just long enough to get him lax and then flicked the thick bone suddenly at him.  It bounced on his chest and down into his pasta bowl.  “We eat good.  But we just fuck all our calories away.”

“Gotta’ keep the cardio rate in check at my age.” Moses winked at Grizzly.  Pete chuckled and sipped his beer.

“How you two meet, dare I ask?” Bertrand asked.  He was merrily indulging in a plate of fried catfish

“He gave me a twenty to blow him.”  Curio said.

“Only when I pulled it out and she saw it for the first time, she gave me a fifty back.”  Moses laughed.  The Fontenots giggled.

“Actually, we met over on Bourbon.” She spoke and shoveled potato salad.  “I was out having a few drinks minding my own business and the next thing I know, I’ve got a fucked–up hangover and I’m gettin’ deep-dicked by some kickass redneck hit man at some swamp shack out in Houma.”  She looked at Moses.  “That about right?”

         “Sums it up better than I could.”  Moses was cutting up a rare teriyaki ribeye.

         “You just see some cute lil ole girlie and bring her into da fold like dat?  Please tell me you ain’t got a habit of dat.” Grizzly said.

         “What can I say?  I’ve got a kinky thing about snatchin’ strange women off the street and taking them to the house so I can tell them what I do and kill them.  Boy them gators ain’t complaining.  They been eatin’ good on them gals I’ve had to let go.”  He looked at Curio.  “Sorry you had to find out like this, baby.  They actin’ like they don’t know that, but really they kinda’ like to beat each other off when I kill them bitches and throw ‘em in the bayou.”

         “Yeah, like that’s gonna’ happen.”  She laughed at the notion and took a sip of her house lambic.  “Better hope that don’t reach the papers.  Incestuous fag gangsters who like to watch old hayseeds from Texas kill fallen young women after he gives them the fuckin’ of their young lives.  I can just see that on Hard Copy.”

          “As if.”  Pete chuckled.  He looked at Bertrand.  “I gotta’ say for da record, baby bro.  Dat’s some damned woman he done met.”

        “One of a kind, gentlemen.”  Moses agreed.  There was a hidden resignation in Grizzly’s tone he did not like for some reason.  “Come on, now.  Did you two really think I would just drag some random skank out to the house and let her in the fold?  Worse yet, bring her on jobs, without her being some kind of special?  Check her out,” he sized her between his hands, “ain’t she everything a man like me could hope for?”

        Grizzly looked at Curio.  He propped up on an elbow and scratched at his neck with his hand while forking up pieces of baked yam with the other.  At that angle, with his long black hair falling in front of his face, she could have sworn he looked like De Niro in Angel Heart.  She reminded herself that De Niro was Lucifer in that movie.

“You know, of course, ain’t none of dis thing we do good for our health, raht?  It ain’t nevah got no fairy tale ending, little girl.  Yo’ Prince Charming der, he one of my oldest friends in dis world.  I do damned near anything fo’ him and he damn near do anything fo’ me.  He know da rules and dat’s da only reason we sittin’ here like old biddies gabbin’ ‘bout deez things like we doin’.  My first inclination, unfortunately, is to retire you both.”

He ate a piece of fish after he dipped it in tartar sauce.  The couple only listened. 

         “Now we all good friends around nyah.” He chewed and spoke to Curio, “’Cept you, of course.  It would pain me greatly to do all dat harm to him and you, ‘specially after I done met you.  You one crazy little minx.  Wilder den a buttermilk fart and twice as wet for him, I be a-bettin’.”

“Niagara Falls could take a tip from her after a job.”  Moses said.  His hand eased under the table and pulled up her skirt.  She kept a knife lashed to her thigh out of habit and had done so since she began living alone on the streets not so far from where they now sat.   

His hand dragged up to the scabbard.

           The blade was missing from it.  His hand came sharply up and back to his steak knife.

           “I’m sho’.  I’m sho.’”  Bertrand placed both of his hands on the table’s edge. 

         Right where he can pick up the gun he probably has in his lap, thought Moses. 

His eyes darted between the two brothers.  Curio sat very still.  He could sense her muscles tensing.  One hand was missing by her side.  The other stabbed at broccoli covered in cheddar cheese. 

        “You sayin’ we can’t be friendly?” Curio’s eyes closed into a wickedly calm squint.  “I really hoped we could be.”

        Moses clasped her around her shoulders.  “We’re friends.  You can put the blade away.”

        “I can?” She never took her eyes off of Pete Fontenot.  He was again scowling at her.  Her hand came up and she jammed the knife into the wooden table.  “I better fucking can!  Or Shakespeare pissin’ and cryin’ about some woman scorned is about to be the fuckin’ understatement of all time up in this shitty fuckin’ restaurant!”  She stood up and pulled the knife free.

        “Whoa, whoa, whoa!  Holster that shiv, you dumbass!”  Grizzly’s eyes got wide.  He made shooing motions.  Pete was caught with one hand holding a fork and the other holding a mussel shell open to facilitate dragging out the meat.

        “I think we all gettin’ friendly now, right?” She growled.  Moses bit his lip.  He could not be for certain that she was not in the right to be defensive.  His eyes continued to what for the tell-tale subtlety of one of the brothers’ unseen hands working into a firing position.

Her gesture with the knife put in her far more immediate danger than he guessed she realized.  Killing Moses and Curio in such a public place was never an option until she brandished a weapon.  Now they could do so legally.  Somewhat. 

Moses began to panic.  He never let it on, but a shudder ran down his spine as he realized she was serious…and the brothers could be as well.

        “We’re all friendly, baby.”  He laughed and tried to pull her into her chair.  His hand tightened on his steak knife.

        “I ain’t too goddamned convinced of that, Moses.  With all due respect, baby.”

        “Sit down, goddammit!” Pete bellowed.  “You get pinched in here, we all got problems.  Our’s will be more easily solved den yoze, mon cheri.  Put dat toothpick back ‘tween yo’ legs where it belongs.”

        Grizzly stared angrily at Moses. 

        “Sit down.  They ain’t a-doin’ shit.  It’s okay.”  Moses physically pulled her down into her chair.  Her face was flushed.  He knew the look.  There was no fear, only the unnatural excitement he knew she was seeping under her skirt as she readied for action, coupled with the desire to protect them both.

The Fontenots had no idea how hair-trigger paranoid she probably was at that instant.  Their assumption that he could stop her from leaping across that table and laying them open all the way down to the neck-bone was vastly over-estimated.

        “You want my fucking blessing on dis…dis…” Grizzly waved his hand at them. “Dis whatevah da fuck y’all think it is?  Nevah.  Nevah!  Do no stupid shit like dat again.” He pointed at her. 

           She was still on edge, her eyes burning at Pete.  Pete’s still demeanor seemed far more menacing than his brother’s.  “What da fuck, Moses?  You ain’t teach her discretion, I see?  What in da hell, Tex?”

        Moses took the knife from her hand and cut his steak with it.  “Can you blame her?” He shrugged and ate a piece of beef he skewered with her blade.  “We’re both a little nervous about this bullshit you two think you needed to bring us to.  This whole idea is stupid.  You bring us out…never mind out somewhere where Randall Jowanski is liquoring up his cock warmer for a few minutes of passion and eight hours of snoring later, I bet…” He sipped from a water glass.

“But out here where she’s supposed to interview for a job she’s already been a-doin’.  Way I see it, it ain’t serving none of us any good sittin’ and sippin’ where anybody who knows who y’all are can drop a dime on me and her.  You want to know about the danger she poses?  You want to negate risk, as Pete likes to call it?  Then eat up, drink up and let’s go someplace where I don’t feel like the ref who gets hit by a chair in a goddamned wrestling ring sittin’ here like this.”

        “Grizzly Fontenot.” Curio said slowly.  “I’ve done five jobs with this here specimen of a man.  Five jobs for y’all.  Some were easy.  Some were hard.  But they got done and I didn’t lose no sleep one night about doing any one of them.  I aim to do as many more as you offer.  And I intend to do them in such a manner that makes him and me a shit-ton of money and gets us both home alive and in love until death do us part.”  She looked at Moses quickly.  “Not that I’m talkin’,” she feigned hiking up a belt and spitting as she intoned like a Texan, “a-gittin’ hitched up or nothin’.” 

         “Just to clarify.” He nodded and winked at Grizzly.  The brothers looked at each other, suddenly amused.

         She looked squarely at Pete.  “He’s happy so I’m happy.  You’re both happy.  The job’s done so whoever gets the contract put on them ain’t too happy, but fuck them, right?  It’s a win-win for all us sorry motherfuckers, ain’t it?”  She folded her arms.  “We agreed?”

         “I agree,” said Moses. “I’ma put in a few pennies in here in the interest of clarifying a few things.  It’s kinda’ so simple I think it needs stating again.”  He held her hand and pulled himself closer to Curio.  “I love this woman here.  I can say that freely and it ain’t no bullshit.  We’ve been together damn near two years now.  I know that was a shock to y’all but the shock’s had time to pass and what I want is y’all to see it for what it is and decide if y’all want me to still work for you.  Working for you from now on means I don’t work alone no more.  Carve it in stone.  It’s doctrine now.  It’s a new rule.”

         “Moses!  Jesus, man…” Pete rubbed his forehead.  Moses waved him off.

           “Now, Pete?  You two known me for forever and a day.  And you know I ain’t prone to a-gittin’ pussy-whipped nor am I keen on doin’ some dumb shit that gets me and y’all busted or killed.  So I guess it needs to be said by me, since I brought her into the fold like I done.  I’m sorry I done it how I done it but I ain’t un-done-ing it.  Me and her are together.  We gonna’ be together and I think seein’ as how she’s a little more than just someone I just told about what I do, she poses no risk to you two hoodlums.”  He made a show of pretending to ponder that for a moment.  “Well maybe a risk to you, Pete.  But only because you would probably hog all the women if we all three all went out together.  She hates competition and she’ll stab you in an eye to win a redhead from you.”

         “You mighty flip about all dis, Tex.” Grizzly said.  His eyes watched Curio.  She had an intensity to her that he found troubling, yet it also was reassuring.  His biggest concern about her was that she may be too wild. 

He knew Moses as only a man of intense self-control.  It was the greatest attribute about the man, given his peculiar employment.  His eyes saw the wildcat Moses was holding by the paw; her fangs were still bared.  His simple holding of her hand was all that was stopping the unleashing of a hell Bertrand could only imagine was ferociously volatile.

Seeing his ability to hold her at bay, and above all else, loving Moses like another brother and not wanting to order the man’s death finally swayed him just as their server came up the stairs.

         “Anyone thinking about dessert?” She asked as she refilled and pre-bussed.

         “We staying for dessert?” Moses Holliday raised his eyebrows at his friends and longtime employers.  Curio Phelonie looked at the pretty server and smiled.  Pete looked at his brother.

Everyone looked at Grizzly Fontenot.  He examined Moses and Curio for a moment.  With a sigh, he made his call.

         “Aw, what da hell!”  Grizzly Fontenot burst out into a laugh. “Something sweet after all dat meat we done chewed on sounds mighty fine, mon cheri.” He rapped on the table.  “And order up a bottle of some champagne.  We gonna’ toast to our friends, old and new.”

        The server left for a dessert menu and the bubbly.



        “Well, that was easy enough.” Moses closed the door for her as they readied to leave the parking deck an hour later.

        “I played it pretty cool, didn’t I?” She smirked. “I think I got drunk on that champagne.” 

        “Cool?” He winced in thought as he got in and shut his door. “That wasn’t exactly Frank and Dean kinda’ cool, but there ain’t no arguing with results.”

        “I thought Pete was gonna’ push me into stabbing his ass.”

        “Pete’s a rag doll.  Grizzly was the one pointing the gun at you the whole time.  Pete’s actually the rational one. He’s the thinker.  Don’t forget that.  Ever.”

“You really put yourself in a sling having me around, don’t you?” She slid over and hugged him.

        “We’d be dead right now if it hadn’t gone as well as it did, baby.” He kissed her.  “But for the record, my love?  I’da died happy.”

        “You are way too sweet to be makin’ a living shooting people, you do know that, right?”  She pushed her lips to his cheek hard to leave her lipstick imprint on it deliberately.

        “Just keep that one to yourself around them, ‘kay?” He winked at her.  “Let’s go home.  I’m full as a tick.”



        “So.  Show’s over, Bertie.” Pete cranked up the Cadillac and drove his brother to pick up his car near Emeril’s.  “We gonna’ move on dem two lovey-dovey death sentences or we gonna’ let dem take us down with dem one sunny day in May at some point.  Tex really done got me all twisted up on dis bullshit a-his.  I can not believe dis da same man we talkin’ about.  Christ almighty he done threw me fo’ a damned loop with dis bullshit.”

        Grizzly looked at his brother and bit his thumb a long while.  Finally as they pulled alongside his gold Cadillac, he folded his arms and decided. 

         “Pete, dis nyah is Moses Holliday we talkin’ about.  He a good friend to you but he done saved my life.  To you, dat was a long time back, but to me, it’s kinda personal in a way you cain’t rahtly understand.  You can’t forget Mama, neither.  Mama ain’t no kinda’ way gonna’ take kindly to us retiring ole Tex on account a-him loving some pretty girl who loves him back.  I don’t know how I’m gonna’ tell her Moses done got a partner.”

“Tell her his gal has got a pair of perkies so pretty dat dey done made a man die once.  She’ll understand dat.”

        “Mama’ll probably tell us to put her to work on her side of the club.” He chuckled.

Pete sighed. “Boy, you know dat girl would fetch a wad a-green that’d gag a whale in some circles.  She gettin’ good at killin’ folks and all, but I bet she missed her callin’ slappin’ around all dem gagged-up fairies in dem whippy rooms.  Boy, I bet she is hell to see workin’ in some leather.”

An abrupt chuckle caught Pete off-guard.  Despite her chastening of him and the fact she was probably two heartbeats and one batted eyelash from killing them both, even he had to admit, there was something about the girl.

“I jess can’t rightly believe she already been workin’ like dat, baby brother.  By God, Moses Lone Wolf-ass Holliday done got himself a partner with perkies.  What’s da world done comin’ to?”

Grizzly chuckled and leaned back in his seat.  “Strange days indeed.”

“It’s probably coming down to a world of hurt, Bertie.  Dat’s all.  Just a world of goddamned hurt, I bet.”  Sighing as Grizzly got out of the car, Pete gritted his teeth.  His brother’s flippant acceptance of Curio based solely on her stamp of approval from Moses was typical of him.  Thinking again of the sexy Curio Phelonie’s moxie and breasts, he filed her away as yet another way for them to all get killed. 

         There were plenty of those, so he let it be.







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