My Kid Won't Bathe

Sarah has decided to do something new: she is refusing to bathe. It's been three days since her last jump through the rain locker and it's so bad I don't want her anywhere near me. I'm fighting the urge to tell her she smells like the back end of a pig. I have told her that her friends will make fun of her and they won't be nice about it. She cried and told me that I was making fun of her.

I'm so frustrated by this I am not sure what to do. Part of me wants to scream and yell--my parents would have--and order her into the shower. My husband is of the opinion that it's her body and she should suffer the natural consequences.

Sarah is ten, on the verge of puberty and is acting like a pod person has taken her over. I remember going through the "I don't want to bathe" phase; I was twelve, it lasted two days and my head itched like I had a rash. The second day wasn't over and I couldn't wait to bathe.

She promised last night (and tonight) to take a bath at eight o'clock. She didn't keep her word. I gave a small speech on not making promises you don't intend to keep.

I Googled "why won't my kid bathe" and was surprised to find out that some people who suffer from depression (including kids) refuse to bathe. That was scary as hell. Depression runs in my family and I don't want it landing on my ten year old kid. It's not fair for someone so young to suffer like that.

Is she experimenting with making her own choices? If she is, then she's making bad choices. Some people would probably tell me to stop letting a kid run the household. The mood I'm in, I'd tell them to fuck off. But still, why is she mulishly holding onto an idea that doesn't work? Maybe she feels stuck with the choice she's made and doesn't know how to 1) deal with it, 2) make a better one.

I keep asking Sarah why she's acting this way. All I get is a tiny voice, "I don't know." Does she think if she takes a shower, Mommy has won? I asked her that and got the same response.

I'm calling the doctor tomorrow and see if they have any advice.