December 15th 1850
The expedition of which we have decided to undertake has done nothing but plague us since the very beginning. Even as we left our home in Virginia something was decidedly wrong, it all began as we left our comfortable home in Virginia to travel to California in order to establish ourselves in the gold mining industry, as we left the children began to cry out and express their concerns with an expedition of such length. That was nearly three weeks ago things weren’t so bad then, we overlooked the small problems that were oh so obvious, but this would truly be the cause of our demise, for as it only takes one snowball to become an avalanche so it did for our problems to become a leading sponsor of our tragedy. In our first week on the trail we had just left Virginia, from there on we ran into an avalanche of problems that would soon escalate into one huge ordeal of which would begin our slow descent into a living hell. As our trip to California progressed we eagerly pushed forward in an attempt to reach the city of Independence, MO. before our supplies ran out, if only a lack of supplies would have been our biggest problem, that would have made our apocalyptic journey seem that it may end without the death of us all, alas it would not be so. As we reached Independence, MO. the weather didn’t improve, although up until this point it had just been fine, it had turned from mildly cold to blistering cold, the accumulation of snowfall and ice in those short days after we left Independence, MO. were record setting, and they in no way helped us out on our journey. Disregarding the incredible amount of snow and ice that had fallen, we didn’t give up hope yet, we pushed on with a renewed vigor of which even the ancient warriors of old would have admired, we were not scared, nor were we intimidated, we were in fact arrogant, which was one of our biggest mistakes. Up until this point we hadn’t had many severe problems, it was only till the mountains did we run into a steady wall of trouble, those mountains, they stood there as if they were Gods from some ancient and forgotten time, slowly being devoured by nature ever so slowly. As we progressed through our journey our faith had not wavered, we had read the bible daily in an attempt to keep the lord’s favor, and to remind us of what home was, however we were constantly reminded of the dreary situation that we were in due to our frequent consultation of the Prairie traveler, without this key guide, our expedition may have ended up even worse than it did, if that’s even a possibility. Around this time is when I started noticing the peculiar events, as the mountains were being worn away, so were we. At first it seemed insane, but then as I truly came to the startling realization that we were lost in the mountains, and our Prairie traveler had gone missing a few days ago, we may have been able to maintain ourselves without it, were we not in these cursed mountains. They loomed over us; almost mockingly as they knew that our flame of life was being slowly extinguished by the same force that had been wearing them down for so many thousands of years. As the prairie traveler had so carefully documented, we had chose the colt revolving pistol, not in an attempt to kill others, but in an attempt to protect ourselves should the situation arise, all of this very rapidly was distorted from its primary purpose, the colt was now used as a hunting weapon, due to our rifle being out of ammunition. Although it’s shot was true, it was in no way built for hunting of the kind we were doing, and we soon found ourselves without the ammunition to even defend ourselves should someone, or something come after us, this coupled with the fact that we had no food made our situation even more dire. Without food we became increasingly more weak and disoriented, it soon became apparent to myself and the others that we may not be leaving these cursed mountains, they had sealed us off from the world, there was no one who would find us up here, so in a last ditch effort we made a descent of the most disastrous kind, as we were going down the mountain, one of the kids injured their knee, I have no doubt in my mind that I shall personally witness every level of hell for this most atrocious offence, but we had to leave him, for the other kid’s sake. Things didn’t get any better after we left our child, it seemed they got worse due to the rest of us being in a paranoid state. We were nearly half way down the mountain when fate decided to rear it’s ugly head once more, tragedy struck upon what little remained of our civilized family as I watched the women who I had loved so dear fall off into a ravine, I thought of an attempt to rescue my one and only love in life, however as I peered into this black abyss, I knew nothing let alone a human could survive such a fall. The events of the past few weeks had done considerable damage to the moral of the one remaining child, and myself included. I set upon the mountain with such will and determination to at least see my last son through, that maybe one of us would make it off this accursed mountain and live to tell the tale of which I’ve so painfully documented. However it would not be so, my last son was torn from this world by a fever of the likes I’ve never seen, it struck quickly and without much pain did he slip into a sleep from which he would never awake. God himself has abandoned me and my family I realized, so without hesitation I threw from my hands the bible of which had given me false hope. The events didn’t brighten for me, it was like some sick joke, I was reminded every day of the ones who were so dear to me, now lost to this wretched mountain, I mused over the possibility of me living and making it off this mountain, however I soon realized that I wouldn’t allow that, a crime such as that would surely drive me mad, so with my last thoughts before I reached the brink of insanity, I decided to end it all. This is where we part ways my friends, whoever reads this you were my friend, my only friend, as you have experienced what I have through my writings, i can’t express the great sense of agony that I feel at this moment, however you shall see no more notes from me, as I’m on my way to be reunited with those I love.