|Pot Stirrer: A person who feels it necessary to try and create more drama in regards to a situation/argument/debate in which they are an outside observer. Usually by way of a comment or statement.
Well I did fall for it. I absolutely did. Man oh man, did I ever. Luckily I can give myself a break because I do the hard work, on myself. I do have the internal mettle to actually stick with therapy, stick with volunteer work, make commitments and complete them, show up over and over again without the excuses. Too busy. Too important. Too above all of whatever.
Nope, I show up. Mistakes and all I do actually show up. Warts and all, I do actually show up. I do what I say I will do over and over and over again.
And, yes, I can be manipulated. I can be a chess piece in someone else’s game. It takes less time to figure out I am standing on the chess board. The check mate is less dramatic. I am learning.
Pot stirrers look like, seem like Buddha’s on the mountain top. They are the mother earth women and monk men……on the outside. And seething with rage and anger on the inside.
They are the fire igniters. You have to sit back and watch while they fan the flames of drama everywhere they go. Out of their own unhappiness. Out of their own huge need to put the spot light anywhere, God, anywhere but on themselves.
They are the most devious because they are dressed like a placid lamb. This is what they want the outside world to see. A most peaceful monk, the zen master, the yogi.
They ignite the flames of drama everywhere and sit back to watch the fire burn. When that fire is burning they can point the judgmental finger at everyone dancing on the fires they lit, “look, everyone else is crazy. They are the ones dancing on hot coals, not me”. But look closely. Those pot stirrers are always holding the match.
It is in their blessed absence that calm and peace prevail. Everyone singed by their fire feels relief. A balm sets in at the calm. The too nice will scratch their heads in wonder at what just happened, not really figuring out why there is the absence of negativity and lack of drama.
The fringers, those that live outside of “normal” and “acceptable” behavior, figure it out. Ah ha! Burned again. Learning the lesson. Play the end well or you get blamed as the crazy one. How dare you accuse Mother Earth or Father Time of being devious, of being a pot stirrer.
Play it cool. All gets revealed in time. Emotions played upon, played up to keep the pot stirrer entertained. And as soon as they leave and the giant vacuum that is left pulls everyone out of their Stepford trance to realize they have been played. They have been manipulated. Nothing they felt about others, about themselves was truly valid. It was the match carrier igniting drama out of the hole of emptiness, the whole of pain that is simply too great to confront.
It is easier for them to play with others than confront themselves.
Be careful. Others saw, others warned, my own gut warned. I chose to ignore as is my pattern.
But again. It took less time to figure it out. It was less dramatic. I hold my power regardless of what was ever said, written, or done. At least I confront mySELF. At least I have the balls to look into my abyss, show my failings, and forge ahead anyway, in front of the world.
I was a pot stirrer too. I can see right through you.