"Excuse me?" Jenna asked. Using her ever-present deductive reasoning skills, my other friend Chrissie helped me pry my mouth open. I moaned and laid my head on the table.
"I will never, ever, in my entire existence, ever live that down. Alex Davies just passed and asked me how I was doing, while my mouth was glued together with a peanut butter sandwich," I complained. Chrissie, sympathetic person she was, didn't care.
"Get over it," she said, rolling her eyes. "He asked you if he could have your apple."
"This is a huge improvement!" I protested.
"From what? Completely ignoring you? Quit whining. Stick to sports," she countered. Hmph. Easy for her to say. Chrissie had an unnatural gift. I had issues with, well, I had issues.
"Stupid sandwich," I huffed. On instinct, I picked it up and chucked it across the cafeteria. It just barely missed Alex (thank God) and sailed right into the head of Alex's best friend, Ian Thompson. Oops.
"Dude!" Ian yelled.
"Wasn't me, man, I swear," Alex grinned, stifling laughter. "But you know what this means, right?" Ian smirked a horrible, terrible, run-away-screaming-Uncle smirk. I gulped.
"FOOD FIGHT!" they shouted.
Jenna squeaked and dove underneath the table. Food was flying everywhere. It was pandemonium. Serves me right for thinking a bunch of fourteen year old guys could be mature. The entire eighth grade male population was going absolutely nuts. The girls were only slightly better.
"Hey, Samson, heads up!" Alex called from across the room. I looked up just in time to see a bagel hit my face. I fell on my butt. Aren't I attractive?
I blinked and saw Alex standing over me with a concerned look on his face.
"You okay, Kelly?" he questioned. I nodded and he helped me up. Alex grinned and picked up a banana. He jogged away, calling over his shoulder, "Try to survive, Samson!"
I sat back down next to Chrissie with a stupid smile on my face.
"So, Kelly, what have we learned from this?" Jenna asked from underneath the table.
"This school has really crappy bagels?" I guessed.
"No duh, Einstein," Chrissie rolled her eyes as she threw a grape at me. "But what else?"
"Alex looks really cute in spaghetti sauce?" I tried again.
"No," Jenna said, peering out from underneath the table. "If you want a guy to notice you, throw a sandwich at him."