Swimming Through The Ashes

-Swimming Through The Ashes of Another Life-
by
Keaton Foster



The past, sweeping away
The recent distance, close
I am always fighting to escape both
I am always trying to be something
And someone that I am not
I refuse to face what’s behind me
I refuse to accept what’s in front of me
I am a neutral stone in the middle of the sea
No other human being is close
No other human being can be felt
It just me and my weight
All around are such hellish creatures
The evilest of teachers
With something important to say
Their words, sharp and pointed
Their accusations find a home
Hurting me increasingly more
They confess their sins
Removing them from skin
Jamming them inside me
Right behind my eyes
God of mercy, the pain
How does it ever hurt
Debilitating in every way
Crippling me each new day
I feel like an immovable being
Turned into a finite object
Increasingly more and more
I am becoming heavier
Soon I will be unable to float
Soon I will drown under my own weight
Swimming through
The ashes of another life
Treading circles
Nothing can be seen
In every possible direction
Where will I end up
Where can I find peace
Unknown
To the depths I may be
Forced to find home
What’s down there
Concerns me most of all
The line between heaven and hell
Is not tied to any lifeboat
There is too much extra slack
Many frayed threads woven as one
Someday under such weight
The line will snap free
Someday we both will break
For as long as I can
Within every sacred breath
I will do what I can to lesson
The true weight of who I am
And all that I have done
I will do what I can to hold on
To stay afloat
Swimming through
The ashes of another life
With no end in sight
Just more of the same
Just pain and fear
Over what I cannot change…



Swimming Through The Ashes of Another Life
Written by Keaton Foster Copyright © 2012.