Ana, My Friend

"Ana, My Friend"
(started 9/14/00. finished 9/15/00 - age 16)

Ana, you're always here.
I invite your presence.
But, Ana, somewhere near
Is a friend I need.

Ana... my best friend
Best friend, worst enemy, too.
Turning me against myself
Pain to my family
Hurt that I drag them through.

Ana, I love you.
I listen all the time.
But your influence is killing me.
Although I am "just fine."

Ana, leave me now.
You've caused much pain, you see.
But, Ana, I need you now.
Without you, there is no me.

Ana, I can't stand to lose you.
So much you've given me.
But, Ana, you must go soon.
Say "good bye," pack your bags, and leave.

Ana, you have left me.
Oh so scared I am without.
But, Ana, I think I'm better.
Happier, no doubt.

Ana, its been a year now.
I wanted you back sometimes.
But, Ana, I am living now.
And my life is really mine.

Ana, I'm glad you're gone.
I don't want to see you again.
Ana, how I hate you so.
And please leave my friends alone.

***Update as of May 3, 2005:

I had said that this journey extends beyond my current position when I first wrote this.
I can now say that it's nearly accurate for my current situation.
Thank you to EVERYONE who has been there for me along the way.