The Southern Tongue

The Southern Tongue
Or
Momma, why can't I understand what Bubba is a saying?

This is an exposition about how we southerners talk, which is not very easily understood by those who were not blessed to be born here or while being born in the south, had the misfortune to grow up in a city away from us colorful country folk. There is a real blessing about being raised up in the sticks (that’s southern for way out in the country). As a matter of fact, I growed up so far out in the country, we had to mail order daylight and we didn't get the Grand Ole Opry till Wednesday (for you uninformed, the Grand Ole Opry came on radio on Saturday night!). It's terrible when I have to explain my jokes! Life is simple in the country and you don’t have to be encumbered by all the frou-frou that so entangles the lives of urban dwellers.

At the present time, I am out of my element since I am living for a while among the urbanites. One’s accent does seem to wane in this element, however, I get back to my roots often and the accent that was imprinted on me all those formative years comes back full force. My wife, who grew up here, but was a city girl, often remarks, “When you go home to momma and nem (mother and them), you start talking just like all those people who live there.” I just smile and say, “Ain’t it so!”

Frequently on planes, or hotels and shopping malls when I am visiting places like Chicago, or any place outside the south, folks will come up to me and say, “Say something. I just love to hear you people talk.” Yep, southern is definitely the in thing with many who are not familiar with us. Start speaking with a southern accent and you sound like a homegrown philosopher. Southern-speak will give a lawyer a 10-20 percent edge in the courtroom, maybe 40-50 percent in a southern courtroom. You ever notice that Matlock ain't never lost a case!

One story I have heard several times, though I am not sure if it’s true or not is the one about the man from the south calling an office in one of the New England states. His dialect was so thick the lady in the office had difficulty understanding what he was saying and finally asked, “What language are you speaking?”

“Anglush, mam,” came the answer.

“Well,” said the lady. “It’s certainly not the King’s English.”

“Oh, yesum,” he responded, “Me and Elvis talk jest a lack!”

As I started thinking about this subject, I doubt seriously I or any other one person could adequately cover it since it is so broad and varied, so I am not going to try to be comprehensive. The reason is, the dialects of all the southern states differ from each other. Someone not “growed up” in these states may think the dialects are all the same, and that all southerners talk just alike, but rest assured, that’s not true. The differences may be subtle, but they are differences all the same. An Arkansas hillbilly, a Mississippi redneck, a Georgia cracker and a North Carolina Tarheel will communicate, but their dialects will differ not only in the choice of words and phrases, but also in their pronunciation of some common words. It is true though, that many pronunciations will be the same or very similar.

Now, since I “growed up” in Mississippi, I will be addressing the basic dialect of that state, primarily the Red House, Mississippi dialect. I have lived in Mississippi most of my life, having spent about three years in Oregon and twelve in Louisiana. There are those who live in a state or region for a short time, maybe ten years, and feel they understand the dialect. They say, “I got an ear for dialects and I can pick them up quickly.” Well, they may understand the surface characteristics of them, but they don’t really understand. As an example, I lived in south Louisiana in what is called Acadiana where most of the Cajun people live. I understand much of the dialect, and I can say a few phrases that sound pretty good to the outsider. However, to a Cajun, I will never sound like a Cajun.

For the southern dialect and I think most others, there is a certain feel that one must acquire and the truth is, that only comes from many years being immersed in it and part of that immersion must occur during the young formative years to be authentic.

How a word is said will depend on several factors. One factor is what word precedes and follows it. Adjacent words affect how a word is pronounced. Southerners are economical people. They, for the most part, have lived in poor conditions and learned how to live with less and that has carried through in the language. They don’t like to waste words or sounds and so they shorten words or alter their sound if it is more economical. Take the name of our state, “Mississippi.” You non-southerners pronounce every syllable, but we say, “Miz-cippi” or more extreme “Mi-cippi.”

Of course the other side of this economical bent is the tendency to never get in a hurry. For that reason we might spend more time saying a word. "Well" becomes "Whaaaaaaaaaale," which also give us time to think of that next word. And since many are farmers or were farmers (still farmers in their minds) we do things slowly because a farm tractor runs approximately 2-3 miles per hour in the field, and 25 MPH in the old pickup on a country road is flying! I guess that speed or lack of it, just carries over in our conversation. 'Sides, the crops been laid by and we got nothing to do 'til cotton picking time, anyway.

What about the English word “you.” It may be pronounced as “chew,” “yo,” “you,” “jew,” and I’m sure there are other choices, too. If you wanted to ask if a dog belonged to someone, you might say to the person, “Yo dawg?” and he might respond, “Yep,” “Nope,” “Yeah,” “Naw,” etc. An alternative phrase might be, “Zat yore dawg, Bubba?” And the sentence, “I’m going with you,” might be rendered “Ah’m goin wid chew,” or “Ah’m a goin wit jew.” Either form is acceptable in polite southern conversation.

Another common word is the article “the.” You can pronounce it as “thuh” as in “thuh dawg is a settin over thair nex to thuh fridgadair” (refrigerators may be called a fridgadair or icebox). It is also pronounced as “duh,” in the example, “Whur’s duh bucket.” A third pronunciation is “da,” as illustrated by the sentence, “Do da mahn know what he doing?”

Another flourish that can be used in any sentence is to include the article “a” before any “ing” word. A few examples are, “I’m a fixing to whup yore butt.” “He wus a working hard tu repahr thu still.” And finally, “I ain’t never a gonna (southern for “going”) be caught a doing that again.”

Then there is the issue of double negatives. In English, double negatives cancel out one another, however in southern dialect, the double negative is considered appropriate and to be desired in polite conversation. The example, “I ain’t never seen that done before maw got drunk with that pig” is a classic in southern talk.

Another issue in southern dialect is the use of proverbial sayings such as, “He looked lack a calf a looking at a new gate.” The word “flat” comes to mind, and there are innumerable uses for this word. Two examples are, “He can flat pick a guitar,” or “He can flat haul booty (run).”

Then the phrase “bless his/her heart” is an invaluable phrase, because you can say anything about anybody if you preface it or follow it with “bless his or her heart.” “He’s too dumb to pour pee out of a boot with the instructions written on the heel, bless his heart,” serves as an excellent example of this phenomenon.

If you can’t find the right word, in southern, you can just make it up. Some standards that are in use today are “thing-a-ma-bob” or “thing-a-ma-jig.” Then there is “do-hicky” and “wha-cha-ma-call-it.” These all refer to objects for which you can’t remember the correct name. Words can be created for actions, too, like “fer-tit-seling” meaning wasting time doing nothing. These are standards, but you can make up your own if you can’t find a word that fits the situation. You can even take one for an object and change it to an action, like “He jest a thing-a-ma-bobbing around.” It’s really easy, but if you create one, you have to be confident when you use it and if somebody looks puzzled or asked what it means, you just say, “Well, bless yor lidle heart, I thought you wus smarter’n that.” He won’t ask again.

Then you have to learn to use some agricultural phrases, too. “Fair to middling” is a cotton grading term that mean average. “Shucking” mean to fool someone as in “You shuckin’ me?” “Sack and all” is another cotton term that means “in total.” When folks handpicked cotton the sack of cotton was weighed, then the weight of the sack was deducted. This phrase might be used, “She dun got porly, I bet she don’t weigh 90 pounds, sack and all.” “Raised in a barn” is a handy phrase to indicate someone is lacking in manners as in, “You raised in a barn? Then shut the door!” Finally, the phrase “you smell like a wet dog” may be used to inform someone his or her deodorant has ceased to work as in “You smell lack a wet dawg!” Do not use the alternate, "You stink lack a wet dog," as it might be taken as an offense.

Every thing I’ve told you up till now I'm sure makes sense and is very easy to grasp. But there are some words where there is no explanation as to why they are used that way, and we refer to them as irregular words. One example is the word “plum.” It means a small fruit that makes good jelly or to eat right off the tree. If you got a good wild plum orchard that’s not wormy on yo property, it will increase the value of that land by several dollars. But in southern-speak, it’s used to also mean complete. An example is “That town is so little I wuz plum thru it 'fore I could poke my head out the winder” (and it’s not window, it’s winder pane). Words like that just have to be memorized.

I am encouraged to notice that Stories.Com has a bit of a southern flourish. On the email page, once your have completed your message and wish to check it's spelling correctness, you will notice the button labeled, "Spell Check In." That is quite southern in sound, even if it is not correctly southern spelled. Only change to make it really southern is to add the article "a" before the word "spell."

Most folks will say that southerners are friendlier than northerners. That may be true in certain places, but it is due to a misunderstanding. You see, we say things like, “Ya’ll come tu see us, now, ya hear.” “Come on up on thu porch and set a spell.” “Ya’ll jest stay for dinner, we got a plenty, sides, momma needs tu clean out that pantry so she’ll have room to can sum more.” “Eat all thu chicken you want. They’s a dying faster than we kin eat ‘em.” But, we don’t mean any ove that stuff. You call fore you come and go eat in yore own house. And by the way, dinner is at noon and supper is at night. We do agree with you on breakfast.

So, ya’ll come tu see us real soon cause hit’s been a coon's age since we seen you. Momma an' nem got the chicken on the table, the sweet tea made and paw’s got his hands folded ready to say the blessing. So we be expectin you fer dinner.