Stains

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Stains on my pillow from my tears. Laying in bed thinking about the day. My words covering my fears.
Wishing and hoping that something good would come my way. I've heard the saying that 'people who never frown eventually break down' now I know what they mean and why they say it.

I tried to hide my pain from people with my smile and warm attitude. But alone in my room---- well my tear stained pillow tells you what I do.

I try to think posotive around everyone. Laughing and making jokes. But sometimes I look away and feel the tears flowing. When that happens I turn and run. Run to my my comfort---watch myself change. It's like I can't feel anything but pain.

I don't think I've ever felt alive. Most of my life has been full of hate and dispise.I look at you looking at me and I run away and cry.

No one will ever know what I do all alone in my room. Nothing I gain. Just more pain...tears and more pillow stains.