Three Loves (Chapter Sixteen/Conclusion)

I sat quietly watching the court proceedings going on, and I was so proud of my DEMOCRAT LAWYER!!!


Perhaps, I was prejudiced--to the place where I would have thought he was doing a wonderful job if he had simply snorted like a pig and belched the alphabet when called upon to speak.


Love IS blind, or so they say!!!


However, I think, even with someone I'm smitten with, I can tell whether or not they're good at what they do--and, as far as I was concerned, my DEMOCRAT LAWYER was doing chicken right!


The first time I thought he'd made a very good point, I grinned at him and made the "okay" sign with one of my hands--and his body language back to me clearly implied that I shouldn't be so conspicuous in showing my admiration. I took his cue and toned it down.


I sat there quietly until they took a recess for lunch.


When I went out into the hall, he was talking with several of his clients, so I went on to eat at a place I'd discovered down that way when I went to check things out a few days before.


I returned in time for the afternoon session.


There were times when he would appear to be looking off in the distance in the direction of the witness stand when he wasn't the one asking the questions--and I'm sure he WAS paying attention, as he seemed to know what was going on and when to ask what--but I also noticed times when I saw the beautiful blue of the iris of his right eye over in the right corner of his right eye (meaning that he was sneaking long glances back my way while appearing from a distance to be looking in another direction)!!!


At one point, something amusing was said during part of a cross-examination, and he looked back my way with a jolly grin on his face, and I grinned back at him. This sweet interaction can best be compared to watching a funny movie with a date, both of you getting tickled at the same time, and hugging each other while laughing.


But we were at least three or four feet apart, so this was as close as we could get to experiencing this.


There were times when I'd notice him stroking his face--and I imagined that he was imagining his hand being mine. How I longed to be able to stroke his face for him!


Something very exciting has happened that I want to share with all of you!!!


Now, promise not to beat a path to my door with your tin cups, because it can be gone in a hurry, as it's not exactly as if I won at Powerball or the Hoosier Lottery.


But the Wendy's stock I owned with my folks (so to speak, as it was never in my name while it was still in shares but understood by us that I'd be getting a cut of it whenever it sold) has hit the floor we placed under it and has sold!!!


I have a few definite ideas about how to divide up the tithe part, and I've been a tad frivolous in the sense that one of the first things I did to celebrate was to take my folks out to dinner (inexpensive but delicious), and I have a few ideas for pampering myself. I'm going to tell a friend who borrowed a small amount of money from me to further his education that the debt is now the same as paid-in-full.


Other than that, I'm not out to spend it in a hurry. It's more of just knowing it's there with potential to grow when the time comes. I've also been involved in a few business deals, which should bring in even more income.


Anyway, I just wanted to share this celebration with you "just because" -- but, also, because it figures into this story.


You see, back then, my money was a whole lot tighter, and I had to pick and choose such things as my times when I'd be out the cost of a motel. Of course, I still do and still will, because money doesn't grow on trees and this is merely a mini-windfall.


But I definitely could NOT afford a night out at that time--or, at least, I was saving the cost for another time in the year--so I was just down for the day. Besides, I hadn't even packed a suitcase.


If the same thing had happened when I had more money (like NOW!!!), I would have taken a room and stayed for the entire time. But I didn't.


After court was over for the day, my DEMOCRAT LAWYER and I talked for awhile.


He had the most adorable grin on his face--the one that makes him look like a little boy--and he asked me (knowing full well what did, but he just liked to hear this--as he still does!) what I was doing down that way.


I told him that I was down to watch him in action.


He asked me if I were going on down to Mammoth Cave--a question that could have been asked merely out of curiosity but, also, could have translated into, "You wouldn't happen to be staying in this area for awhile, would you?"


I told him that I'd like to but couldn't afford to--and, anyway, I had a poetry meeting that night in Frankton. "I think that town was mentioned today!" I added.


During the trial, someone had been asked whether he was from Franklin or Frankton, and he'd said, "Frankton with a T!"


Now, my DEMOCRAT LAWYER flashed me a big grin and said, "Frankton with a T!"


Our visit ended shortly after that, and I started on back. It was getting so late that I drove on to Frankton with a T to go to the meeting--and was thrilled to see that Dr. Harry Snider (newly turned 87 and with a very advanced case of Parkinson's) had decided to start taking Sinemet. He had gone from being uncontrollably-shaky and being pushed along in a wheelchair to stepping right out while using a walking stick that seldom touched the ground!!!


Seeing Harry in such wonderful shape added more joy to an already wonderful day!!!


I kept up the sending of letters in those envelopes addressed by others with bogus return addresses.


It was a given that my DEMOCRAT LAWYER knew that I was a big fan of Mammoth Cave. I'd also told him about smelling roses on two occasions and then hearing some kind of positive news about him. He knew that I had a teddy bear I'd named after him which I would hug often in hopes that the hugs I gave my bear would somehow be felt by him.


After several false starts, it looked as if Little Ms. Lawsuit and her lawyer would finally be going to quit monkeying around and actually bring her ridiculous case to court in the spring of 1993!


I still kept a yellow ribbon around the trunk of Aunt Ruby's apple tree, replacing it with a new one each time the animals and elements managed to take the previous one off.


I'd mentioned to him once about finding that Valentine message in the paper and, while I didn't believe it was really from him, seeing it as meant to be a sign of comfort for me. I hinted that it would be nice to REALLY get such a message from him--though I doubted that he would send one. Although my fondest dreams had him feeling the same way about me that I did about him, I had no clear sign that those feelings were returned.


Valentine's Day 1993 arrived, and, as usual, I read all of the cute and loving messages in the back of the paper.


Then, I saw it--and I knew that there surely was no doubt!!!


I don't know if I'm quoting this exactly right, as it's been awhile since I've seen it, but it went something like this:


CAVE BEAR:


A cave is such a lonely place--

So dark and cold,

A depressing space.

The she-bear awakens when it is spring

To be warmed by the sun and all it does bring:

The scent of roses,

A field of clover;

At last, she's content--

The long winter's over!


Love,

TEDDY BEAR


I gave a squeal of delight and went waltzing from room to room, because I was suddenly over-energized to where I just couldn't sit still!!!


I picked up Cuddly **** ******** and held him close to me and put SOMEWHERE OUT THERE on the stereo.


In spite of that delightful Valentine's Day surprise, 1993 wasn't one of the best years that I'd ever lived through.


Uncle Finley didn't survive his by-pass surgery on May 7.


Uncle George was found to have colorectal cancer shortly after that and was operated on July 9. Thankfully, he survived--but it was a long road to recovery.


By the end of the year, Daddy was having times when he could hardly stand up, and we were told that one possibility could be a brain-tumor. Thankfully, we found out that it was Parkinson's the first week or so into 1994.


And Michelle (my goddaughter known here as waxmaker for those who don't know already) was going through a lot of heavy-duty teenage angst, and--since we had no idea what the problem was at the time--we were at wit's end when it came to helping her find her way back home.


Since all of this was going on, I can't exactly when the trial finally took place. It almost seemed as if it got postponed again and finally took place in the fall.


My DEMOCRAT LAWYER didn't take part in it (not actively, anyway), since he wasn't included in the group that the lawsuit was aimed at. Even so, I was there in the courtroom keeping my eyes and ears on everything going on.


When Little Ms. Lawsuit took the stand and started telling her lies, I mentally imagined how nice it would have been if somebody had placed a whoopie cushion on the seat--maybe, even one that would emit a foul odor.


I'd decided to forgive her for her past--but she just kept on giving me new reasons to be angry with her.


When she wasn't sneering, she wasn't that bad looking of a woman--in a way, her appearance reminded me of a cross between Etta and Aunt Marce, though both of the latter had it going a lot more in the looks department. Besides, beauty is as beauty does.


I also was touched by the way she related to her kids.


I wanted so much to tell her to forget this business, get an honest job, and devote yourself to your church and family--but it wasn't my place to do so.


She "won" her lawsuit by a technicality--and the judge granted her enough money to pay for part of a meal at somewhere like White Castle for her, her kids, and her lawyer.


She and her lawyer said they were going to appeal. DARN!!!


Time went on. I heard little else except that a higher court had thrown out her appeal as not even worth listening to.


Even after that, I seemed to be no closer to a reunion with my DEMOCRAT LAWYER.


I came to realize that, perhaps, he associated me with some rough times in his life that he'd like to forget.


Sad as it seems, some couples just meet at the wrong time--but, in many ways, we'd met at the right time, because I'd been there for him when he needed a friend. Now, I assumed, my purpose had been served.


Even so, I still sent letters and cards to him occasionally, but I started to realize that I was ready to think about other guys in a romantic way again. When I noticed this happening, I wrote to him and honestly explained my feelings--telling him that, even then, he was the one I loved the most and that I'd be there in an instant if he wanted me in his life.


Over the next few years, I met a lot of special men--one of them, a guy named Walter, I'd grown especially fond of. We were long-distance sweethearts--but he suddenly began trying to put distance between us while claiming that he wasn't doing so. I would find out a few years later, after his death, that he'd just discovered that he had cancer and didn't want to become a burden to me, so he'd just decided to fade out of my life.


SOMEWHERE OUT THERE is a beautiful song that applied to finding love in general, and the song remained special to me in that way. But it was NEVER "our song" with anybody but my DEMOCRAT LAWYER--never, that is, until my REPUBLICAN LAWYER came into my life.


My REPUBLICAN LAWYER was also my first--and last--Internet romance.


It began with admiration. He was a brilliant, funny, and sweet writer on one of the online sites I write for. He wanted to change the world for the better and was even running for Congress.


It grew into a friendship that got closer and closer.


I have my own opinion of whether or not it grew into romantic love on his part, but only he knows for sure, and he chooses not to remember it that way, so I have to respect that.


Things fell apart between us, and we both went through hell while trying to tear down the wall that had formed between us and build another bridge that would be comfortable for both of us to cross.


We've now become close once more--but more like a brother and sister.


When I think back on us now, I realize that we were meant to meet and put our heads and hearts together to make the world a better place, and that will always hold true. But, had we married, we probably would have ended up barely tolerating each other.


There were many traits about him that reminded me of my DEMOCRAT LAWYER--but, also, a considerable amount of traits where I wished that he were more like my DEMOCRAT LAWYER. But, in spite of not holding those things in common with my DEMOCRAT LAWYER, my REPUBLICAN LAWYER was someone whose essence ran through my bloodstream and who will always have a special place in my heart.


SOMEWHERE OUT THERE had once been MY UNSUNG SONG put to music that would describe a yet-unknown man-of-my-dreams.


When my DEMOCRAT LAWYER came along, it became our song.


When it looked as if that chapter of my life had come to a close, it was a wonderful song but never again became "our song" to anyone else until I fell head-over-heels for my REPUBLICAN LAWYER.


If you read my already-written four-part story called


"With Keyboard In Hand. . ." 

as well as the review of THE WEDDING PLANNER I wrote at Epinions.com (which, at this time, I still can't access, in spite of helpful suggestions given to me by my REPUBLICAN LAWYER), you'll learn the rest of the story.


I don't think that it's much of a surprise to you that my love, once more, belongs to my DEMOCRAT LAWYER--also known around here as JOHNNY ANGEL.


There's not this huge romance going on, because we're taking things very slowly.


We're both very busy and haven't really spent a lot of time together--and, sometimes, I still wonder if he might be sorry about that night on June 12, 2001 when he kissed me as he'd never kissed me before, and I returned those kisses.


Maybe, he thinks he acted in haste at this time. I don't know.


The last time we saw each other was right before my birthday in December, and he seemed friendly enough then, but I just have this feeling that he'd like to back off for now and get a better look at the situation and not rush into anything.


I not only respect that but, also, admire that about him.


Perhaps, in the end, he'll end up being a big brother just as my REPUBLICAN LAWYER has ended up being a little brother, and that's okay, too.


Even so--and, especially with the conversation that took place in "Two Cousins & One Cloud Nine!!!" --I'm going to have my dreams for now. . .so, Denise, keep practicing your ballroom dancing!!!