SLOWLY DYING

I am slowly dying inside
The lonely and silence has drained me
Looking for hope to hold on to also dreams
Seems like I can't find anything to help me
Only lies and pain that enforces my soul and heart
The thrills others gets from my pain
The tears rolls with no end to see
The fear of being alive scares me so
What will be happen next to me?
How will I mess up another life?
That I come in contract with
Wanting to stay behind walls to feel safe
Where people can't see me and i can't see them
Always upsetting people making them angry
Because I tried to be strong and brave
To make them pride of something I have done
It seems like I never do right for no one
Always yelling,screaming,also cursing at me
I feel like I don't belong in society or the world
For I feel I am melting away inside from pain
Knowing now there's no hope or dreams for me