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The Top 50!!! These are the Top 50 reasons why E! Television decided to buy and broadcast the Anna Nicole Smith TV Show, ranked in order. Award winning and creatively done as it is, we could have a thousand reasons. Yeah, right! The winners of the prizes are: 1,000 GP David J IS Death & Taxes   Pam  cicada missmozell cj cullen gailey Honorable Mention - 500 GP Rapunzel Mortuus tommync1 lalibelle readmete Starr* Rathburn  Principessa paultheoret 50. Don't question it; just enjoy it. paultheoret 49. What do you think God did on the Seventh Day? David J IS Death & Taxes 48. I think it is called Baksheesh. David J IS Death & Taxes 47. When asked why E! bought ANS, the programming person said, "E stands for enything and enything is Anna Nicole Smith or something like that, right, Vinnie?" Writer of the Winds  46. Who do YOU think has the negatives? David J IS Death & Taxes 45. Because Fabulous Bobby Trendy was having a hard time gaining exposure in the highly competitive world of gay interior designers. lalibelle 44. Because like Mt. Everest, she is there! David J IS Death & Taxes 43. Out here in the boonies, we're still protesting dropping Dick Van Dyke. David J IS Death & Taxes 42. Anna Nicole offered to pay E! 1 million dollars to air her show, and since they are going broke, they accepted. Principessa 41. They thought she was doing a show on geriatrics. David J IS Death & Taxes 40. A high mucky-muck was paying off a bet on the St. Louis Rams. David J IS Death & Taxes 39. Her accent was better than Anna Kournikova's. David J IS Death & Taxes 38. E! did a survey and learned that Fat Broads are hot! Writer of the Winds 37. Someone on the Board of Directors said "We really need a big set of lungs to get our message across." David J IS Death & Taxes 36. E! bought the ANS show to extend a welcome to all of their gold-digging viewers. cicada 35. It was picked up specially to be beamed to Bagdad. David J IS Death & Taxes 34. Jennifer Love Hewitt demanded too much money upfront and Herve Villaichez was dead. tommync1 33. Oh, and T & A; I just saw the commercials, and that was enough for me. Starr* Rathburn 32. She puts the "ass" in "sassy." readmete 31. E! felt that if they could get a low enough rating they stood a chance of revolutionizing the industry rating standards and would, in the future, not have to pay as much for their shows. lalibelle 30. Anna Nicole doesn't fit on my 19 Inch TV so I have no idea. David J IS Death & Taxes 29. Just because Anna is currently holding three of the E! executives' children hostage in her lavish, lime-green basement is no reason to attack her and claim that her show has no value or substance. tommync1 28. E has been taken over by the Al-Jazeera network. David J IS Death & Taxes 27. Writer of the Winds pitched the idea to E so he could have a message forum. David J IS Death & Taxes 26. A.N.S. takes a "blond joke" to a whole new level. Rapunzel 25. She came into the studio for an audition and they found she couldn't get out, so they did the next best thing. David J IS Death & Taxes 24. Because the programming personnel at E! are the three blind mice. Writer of the Winds 23. She lost her red slippers and can't go home. David J IS Death & Taxes 22. Well, it seems E! wanted to float the company on the stockmarket and needed just that little bit extra buoyancy. Mortuus 21. Because she yelled, "EEEEEEEEE!" much better than any of the other casting couch contenders. gailey 20. Someone told the top brass the show was upfront and uplifting. David J IS Death & Taxes 19. They wanted to finish first in the 51-70 group ratings, but did not know the numbers referred to age. David J IS Death & Taxes 18. She does a great stand-up routine, or is it Try to stand up routine. David J IS Death & Taxes 17. George Burns and Santa Claus were unavailable. David J IS Death & Taxes 16. They had hot inside information from Martha Stewart. David J IS Death & Taxes 15. If the truth be known, E! wanted to improve their falling ratings and showed the documentary, believing that Anna Nicole Smith was The Mayoress of Silicon Valley thus, hitting the geek and nerd market. Mortuus 14. There is a world wide plot in the entertainment industry to slowly eliminate any and every last trace of intelligence that the general populace maintains, so as to convert everyone into mindless slaves; Anna Nicole Smith is the perfect example. Rapunzel 13. Because too many are complainin' about anorexic, female "role models" and they're now going in the opposite direction. gailey 12 Are you sure Anna Nicole didn't eat, errrrr, buy E!? David J IS Death & Taxes 11. When ANS' program was proposed, the person responsible for programming dictated a reply, "No. Price too much," and his secretary removed the period (No price too great!). Writer of the Winds 10. Two reasons: OO, and they could be called bouncin' boobs. gailey 9. Their biggest sponsor, Omar the Tentmaker, had a surplus of Tassel material to use up. David J IS Death & Taxes 8. E decided to do the Anna Nicole show because they were trying to appeal to a different market: ex-stripper Playboy bunnies with big fake boobs who are involved in legal battles with their dead husband's families and like to give their lesbian assistants lap dances.cj cullen 7. They had lost their option on "Sweating Bullets." David J IS Death & Taxes 6. Two words: casting couch; well, actually it was more like a casting slab of granite. Writer of the Winds 5. I can't be positive till I reread Revelations, but I'm pretty sure that it's one of the signs of the coming Apocalypse. missmozell 4. Because MTV decided they didn't want ANS fearing that she would eat the Osbornes. . cicada 3. Because Bill Clinton was busy smoking a cigar. David J IS Death & Taxes 2. Because Ozzy Osborne walks and talks too slow??? Pam 1. The Devil made them do it. David J IS Death & Taxes
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